Lived Experience Forum

[Former-Member]

Glad you are posting here and that it helps. I think its great that you can see the positives in your day thats great. All those small/big things make progress for us! I've been so flat lately too, everything is a mission! just looking forward to school holidays so we can hibernate at home for a bit!

LJ

[Mazarita]

Hi @Former-Member, thanks for your friendly response. 🙂 I agree that the small things are important. Hope you are feeling better about the way things turned out with your 'to work or not to work' question. I understand why you were upset with your doctor's change of mind and can also see that it might turn out better anyway. Hoping for the best for you.

[Appleblossom]

@Mazarita

I think it is great to journal daily activity.  I have been doing it on and off since having small kids.

Walking is great til we get blisters.

I found the description of your going to the doctor a little like my first train trips into town. 

I was scared to step from platform to train as felt insecure in my physical balance. The distance seemed so huge and dangerous. I was worried I might slip between .. talk about Body Dysmorphic disorder.  That has been 7 years now and I am regular PT user.

I have come to love the hum of going up and down the escalators in the city.  People can be in a hurry around me or not, but it has become a beautiful part of anonymity for me and helped me reconnect with a general sense of humanity.  All those young and old people with their lives and concerns going about their business. It makes me less threatened and feel more positive people.   I dont need anything from them or them from me .. but sometimes lovely conversations emerge.

[Mazarita]

Thanks @Appleblossom 🙂

I kept a written journal for decades when younger. I'd even say I wrote my way through the worst year I had. But I stopped writing these journals around 10 years ago. I only do it sporadically now.

I love your poetic description of your time alone in crowds and know similar feelings from past experiences and even now on the occasions when I do get out and about. I've also had a yearning to live further away from cities.

[Appleblossom]

I havent looked through my old journals, maybe one day I'll get time, but I know they did me good. They help us process experiences.  The urge to write is still with me.

[Mazarita]

Well, I made it to see the new psychiatrist today. It went okay, I think. He seemed good on first impression. But I was wired high afterwards and the session has been replaying over and over in my head for hours. I have to laugh at myself. Glad I got there at last. Thanks to you at the forum for helping me over these first hurdles in my attempt to take better care. 

[Crazy_Bug_Lady]

Yay Maz!! Glad to hear you made it, and hope you can continue seeing him, and hopefully get better.
❤️ CBL

[Appleblossom]

Great to hear.

Just remember the poor bloke is just another person and though he is paid to have some duty of care .. value yourself equally.

Good luck

[WombatBoots]

Well done Maz :thumbs up:

[Mazarita]

@Crazy_Bug_Lady @Appleblossom @WombatBoots Thanks for the encouragement. 🙂