Lived Experience Forum

[Ayesha]

I debated whether to write this or not..... 

I am waiting for a bed to become available at a private psych hospital. The latest should be Wed (tomorrow) or Thurs.

I am struggling SOOOO much. I am unable to function. Mixed bipolar episode....anxiety through the cathedral roof.... hallucinations thick and fast.

I am so so cold but supposedly its warm and humid. I have taken some PRN medication and it hasnt touched the sides.

I have hit the wall.........and I dont know how to keep coping until admission.

I am waiting for my psychiatrist to ring me back........ to talk calm into me. 

I am safe (S wise) but I am totally utterly depserate

[Dothemo]

So sorry you are feeling this way @Ayesha, I had a mixed episode for 3 months when having a reaction to an SSRI in 2012 so I know the hell you are going through. I am thinking of you. It might be worth calling your state's crisis team or even 000, I think they need to help you right now. Is there a crisis team hotline where you are?

[Phoenix_Rising]

Hi @Ayesha, I am super struggling myself right now, but I wanted to let you know that I've read your post and I hear you. I know how a couple of days can seem like a thousand years when you are waiting for something that you know will help. I hope your psychiatrist calls super soon and is able to help you settle enough to make the waiting a tiny bit less difficult. I'm about to go and snuggle in my bed for a while now, but I really wanted you to know that I hear you.

[getbetter]

Hello @Ayesha I have had a tough day myself, a call to lifeline and the sane line, have you tried calling these? or your state mental health team? I think it may be worth your while to talk to them and try and get to a general hospital,

[Baboo]

Ayesha, have you had dinner tonight? i say these things alot but when your having a really hard time making a check list of simple things to do for the day/night can help. work back from your bed time.

Example:

Bed time 10.30pm

shower and teeth

book, game craft/hobby or movie

dishes

msg a friend (some sort of communication to another)

dinner

[Ayesha]

Thanks everyone I'm so cold and so disheartened ..., I've taken my meds..... they should have knocked me out by now but oh no I'm still going

[utopia]

@Ayesha. Just read this post and wanted to check how you are doing.
I'm so glad you asked for help here. Sometimes it's just good to talk and distract ourselves until sleep comes.
If you are still awake - I'm happy to chat.

[Ellu]

Dear Ayesha,

I have been in the same place. It is hell.

I know what it islike to be waiting for a bed.

I know what it is like to be waiting for a call from your psychiatrist.

Time has no meaning, and your thoughts are all horrible and panicky.

I just want to say that I have been there, and I am feeling for you, more deeply than you know.

Take courage that it will all pass. I promise you, I have been there and it does pass.

Ellu