Lived Experience Forum

[Barb1]

Hi all, I am new to forums but feel the need to search for support or friends with the same things going on. 

I’ve been married 25 years to my husband with him suffering mental illness since before then. He was involved in a school bus accident as an 7 year old boy, which resulted in the death of his sister, he’s now 50 and maybe counselling treatment was not something available in remote rural areas at that time, but no counselling undertaken. 

Long story short, lots of different diagnoses and lots of different medications have been tried with no real long term success. 

I just want to know does anyone find with decision making,one day something is a great idea then the very next day that decision is going to be a disaster? And I mean a full blown ‘sink us’ disaster. (And all we are talking about is getting a  new second hand car) Hubby can never make any decision and be consistent that his decision was right. And then my days after the event are spent trying to reason with him, and my interest/excitement about said new car are well and truly dashed. Is this a common thing?

Apologies for this long winded post. 

 Thanks. 

[Risk]

Yes. I can certainly relate. Diagnosed with acute depression, bipolar. Decision making is fraught. Each decision is followed by an avalanche of doubt, such that all the positives about the decision seem to vanish. Sometimes I’ve found that working through the worst thing that can happen helps to go forward with a d3cision that lasts longer,

[outlander]

Hi @Barb1 and welcome! I hope you find being here welcoming and helpful

Welcome to you too! @Risk

@Mazarita @eth you guys might be able to help here?

[eth]

Hi @Barb1 and @Risk and welcome to the forums.

@outlander thanks for the tag.

Barb1 I have struggled at times over the years with fallout from decisions made when I was accelerated (I have bipolar 1) on the one hand and extreme difficulty making decisions when depressed on the other.

These days if I see myself making sudden impulsive decisions I make myself delay acting on them for at least a few days.  By then I can see better if it's really a good decision or not.  Not sure how you could get your husband to do this tho' - I haven't had experience of having a partner with MH challenges.

[Barb1]

Thank you

[Barb1]

Thanks so much. Is it really hard to get a definite diagnosis? Hubby has been in the past bipolar, acute depression, anxiety. Different meds obviously treat different things. Mental health is such a complex issue. Has such an effect on families.