Lived Experience Forum

[Eden1919]

@sarvan  It can be it really depends but when I did it there was a once a week group that I think went for an hour and a half and a weekly private session for an hour. A lot of it is stuff you have to practice in between but it should be guided in a way. I think either way the online doesn’t seem to be what works for you and it is all about doing what is best for your learning style so I would say look for another group. 

[Former-Member]

Hi @sarvan 

it must be very tough to try it online. The program I was in was outpatient at a mental health clinic, covered by my private health hospital cover. Gaps & psychologist (above 10 sessions) were self funded, it's a massive time & financial commitment, but I'm glad I did it. Group was 5 hours including breaks. 

I personally would only consider doing an online course after doing a year of DBT, just as a refresher, the topics are tough even with support.

[Zoe7]

Sorry @sarvan I absolutely meant no offence - was trying to find a reason that may have helped you but did the opposite - again very sorry for how that came across. I agree with others here - online is so much harder with everything. Actually being in a room with a group and reading body language and the 'tone' of the room is way better than the randomness of online. I would encourage you to continue with searching for a face-to-face group but also suggest the essential component of that is the support from a counsellor/psych/pdoc afterwards to work through what you have done in group. This part for me was the most beneficial in the early days until I became more comfortable with the group. Also we had some very strong personalities in the first group as well as one member that I spoke about in my earlier post that was both highly emotional and distracting so the second time around with a new group was much easier. The dynamics of the group are important for everyone to feel safe, supported and equal despite their recovery stage and that did not happen until the second round. That also meant I got way more out of the sessions as the focus was on the processes and skills rather than navigating any triggers or tensions in the group. I hope you can find the right group for you and it helps as much as it did for me.

[BPDSurvivor]

@Former-Member ,

My therapy For BPD was very similar to yours however, mine was MBT (Mentalisation based therapy), 1 group and 1 individual session a week, but for 18 months. It worked wonders for my BPD. As maintenance therapy, I currently have weekly therapy which encapsulates DBT and ACT.  

@sarvan , mine has all been through the public system. I couldn't find the support I needed in the private sector, hence I got to the stage where I need the Area mental health team and case management. Since then, I've made tremendous progress and will probably move into the private system. DBT is great for BPD, but I think the ground work by a trained therapist needs to be done first before you are ready to jump straight into DBT group. As @Former-Member mentioned, I needed a lot of after-therapy support because the therapy itself is gruelling and intense.

All the best @sarvan .

BPDSurvivor

[sarvan]

Thanks @Zoe7 . I appreciate that

[sarvan]

@BPDSurvivor where on earth do you find these services? I have been kicked out of the Mental Health Hospital in our area because of the BPD diagnosis. I was initially accepted for and Eating Disorder. 

Then I get discharged from a Private DBT group that I had to practically beg to be part of. 

I've been on the wait list for Spectrum for nearly a year and am being told I probably won't get anywhere with them. 

I am feeling like my whole life is just a pile of illness that no one around me understands. 

I went looking today funnily enough for MBT and could only find Spectrum again. 
I haven't got private health insurance, but I do have some money to pay - I just can't find the supports though.

Am I allowed to ask where on earth I start with all of this?

[BPDSurvivor]

@sarvan ,

My MH journey began in NSW. I was tossed here and there to no avail. I received the BPD diagnosis in NSW, but when I asked where I could find help, no one could help me. Back then, BPD has such a stinking stigma that it seemed no one would go near it.

I then moved to VIC. I had enough of myself. I ended up getting referred to Spectrum. This was the beginning of my recovery. Altogether from assessment phase to pre-treatment, to treatment, I spent nearly 3 yrs with them. MBT took 18 months. I was refused by private clinics because I was "too high risk". When I finished my treatment with Spectrum, I only then began to see changes. The 18 months in MBT was like a training for me to get out in the real world and practise the skills... it was, and continues to be, A LOT of hard work. I've learnt so much during my BPD journey. 

Since then, I continue to have maintenance sessions with a psychologist. Spectrum was absolutely amazing. Their expertise and patience in putting up with me meant a lot to me. I didn't feel much difference while going through the program, but in retrospect, it has made a huge difference. Spectrum are very specific in their intake of clients. Priority is given to case-managed clients. The assessment process itself took hours, spanning over lengthy sessions. Ultimately, the work is done within yourself. No one can push recovery onto a borderline. My treatment came at the perfect time. I wasn't ready earlier. 

I believe BPD requires very specialised therapy. Not everyone can take on clients with BPD, yet there are some therapists who thrive on working with such cases. Thank God I'm a lucky one and have found such therapists in Vic. I didn't just google anybody. It just so happened that connections led me to finding the right people.

Spectrum is extremely limited. I don't know how I managed to get in. They were beginning to broaden their program slightly by the time I left. But when I started, there were only about 2 MBT therapists. Imagine a whole 18months with a therapist. Each therapist has a max case-load of 4 clients. So really, that means only 8 clients go through the Spectrum MBT every 18 months. Can you see why they are so limited? Of course they have other shorter programs such as ACT and DBT. 

@sarvan , I'm sorry I can't pinpoint how I managed to find the right treatment. It just happened that way. However, i do believe that if I had to fork out for Spectrum at my own expense, I would not have done it. I know what it's like to pay for all these treatments and therapists, and not see results. That's why people give up. BPD is about changing a lifetime's worth of mindset. That takes more than 10 or 20 sessions. The current recommended fee for private psychology is $240. Imagine 10-20 sessions at $240/session - I would not have been able to fork out that kind of money.

BPDSurvivor

[sarvan]

I hear you @BPDSurvivor 

At this stage, I am loosing hope. A whole lifetime of 40 plus years of living with BPD and depression is taking its tol. 

Do you think it is possible to actually recover from BPD?

Kind regards

[BPDSurvivor]

@sarvan ,

Most definitely you can 'recover'. However, you need to define your meaning of 'recover'. What does recovery look like to you?

For me, recovery was about being able to function in society, feeling fulfillment, having a purpose and an identity. I still have struggles, but if you reconceptualize struggles as learning opportunities, it makes a huge difference.

I am walking and talking proof that BPD is not a life sentence. If anything, I think it is the most amazing and fulfilling journey a person could have. It has taught me so much, helped me develop as a person, helped me to understand myself and others better, and has caused me to realise I am responsible for my recovery. You can say these things with BPD, but it is hard to say it for other MH diagnoses. Other diagnoses may need medication, but BPD is fully reliant on the individual to 'change their story'. How would you like your story to unfold? What would you like your ideal story to look like? What relationships would you like in your story? Considering each of these questions is only the beginning.

I am 100% certain that there is hope for pwBPD. I wish I could help you more @sarvan , but there is only so much I can type on a page. If anything, I just want to say that I have embraced BPD and I am glad to feel the victories that come with it.

BPDSurvivor

[sarvan]

Bless @BPDSurvivor Thankyou