Lived Experience Forum

[Kiera9102]

Does it matter how many friends or people you talk to etc? Because I'm trying to make new friends

[Phoenix_Rising]

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@Kiera9102 wrote:
Does it matter how many friends or people you talk to etc? Because I'm trying to make new friends

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Hi @Kiera9102,

I'm interested to hear more about your question. Do you mean is there a "right" number of people to talk to? I think people vary a lot in how much social contact they want/need. I am pretty reclusive, mostly because I've been super hurt by a lot of people over the years. If you are wanting to make friends with people here on the forums, there are a lot of social threads where people chat about all sorts of things. They tend to be under the "enjoying time with others" heading.

[Kiera9102]

Thank you for your reply and well I was homeschooled and went to pubic school and only talked to like two friends but needed up losing them and now I have made about 5 friends and am hoping to get closer to them and make more but I just feel like I should have more because I see people who talk to like the whole school but does it matter how many you have?

[Lunar]

Hello @Kiera9102

I think this is a really good question. For me it really comes down to quality over quantity, it can be too much pressure having too many friends to catch with and see all the time and I get why people have lots because it keeps them busy, but personally I prefer the couple of close friends that I have to catch up with one on one and who know me better than the people I have a friendly chat to down the street. I would not want too many people knowing everything about me as that is my personal life, so for me it is safer to only tell those personal things to maybe 1 max 2 good friends.

Although, I do like having those friends that I can just have a laugh with and be someone who is just fun and nothing heavy as that can help distract me too. I guess it just depends of what kind of support I need at that time.

Lunar 🙂

[Former-Member]

Hi @Kiera9102

No, it does not matter how many friends you have nor is it a measure for your worth. All that matters is that the ones you have are genuine friends who truly care for you and you care about them. And that you feel you can be yourself with them and talk freely - and be there for them when thy need you. That's what healthy relations are all about and good for our mental and emotional well being.

It's good to extend ourselves and talk to others outside our niche for sure and have acquaintances, but those who feel they need to surround themselves with others to feel popular is a superficial kind of friendship that doesn't last beyond the first bump. The genuine ones stick for life and whom matter. And they are rare 😊