Dealing with intrusive thoughts - my struggle!

[Molliex]

Edit: This has evolved to become a vent thread and supportive thread. Everyone is welcome to come, vent. say hello, and especially seek support with their intrusive thoughts.

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I've been newly diagnosed with GAD, depression and OCD. I'm in my mid 30s and have been dealing with this stuff my entire adult life. The tipping point was severe post natal depression that I almost didn't survive. I'm getting help for me, but also because I don't want my kid to pick up my issues.

Often my intrusive thoughts are about world events, but at the moment they're suicidal. They push their way into everything i do/think and I'm so exhausted, just trying to ignore them. It's scary and I'm suffering insomnia. I'm currently off work for this week while I adjust to new meds, and my GP and psychologist are suggesting hospitalisation. 

I've been trying mindfulness and exercise, as well as limiting alcohol (which I find hard).

So I guess I'm looking for suggestions and support. This mental health journey is so new for me and I feel very alone. I want to make it through this.

Thanks for reading, I really appreciate it.  I just also want to state that I am currently safe and with family. 

[Former-Member]

Hi @Molliex

Welcome to the SANE forums.  I am Whitehawk, the forum moderator this evening. I have noticed that you describe your thoughts as being suicidal. It sounds like you are in a very rough patch at the moment.  I ask you to you to take care of your personal safety this evening.  I will send you an email off the forum to check in with you and offer you support.

I am confident that you will find the forum members will be supportive, informative and connecting.  Please feel free to ask the moderators about using the forum and also check out the forum guidlines.

Please take care,

Whitehawk

[Shaz51]

hello @Molliex  and welcome to the forum my friend ,

letting you know you are not alone

my husband was diagnosed with OCD, SAD, GAD MMD and now bipolar11

hello @Former-Member , @utopia , @Gazza75 

[Molliex]

Hi Whiehawk.
Thanks for your concern and email. I'm safe and not at risk right now. Just looking for support and maybe some coping strategies.

[Shaz51]

Just looking for support and maybe some coping strategies. @Molliex  xx

@greenpea, @eth , @CheerBear , @outlander , @frog , @Faith-and-Hope , @MDT 

[Faith-and-Hope]

Hi @Molliex 

I have an “unsolvable riddle” in that my hubby has developed a mental illness with no insight into being unwell.  As he is an adult, there is nothing I or our adult kids can do to wake him up to his behaviours, and he keeps them well hidden from medical view, aggressively so.  It’s been something of a nightmare for ten years now, so it sometimes turns over and over in my mind as if there is some sort of way around it that I just haven’t worked out yet ..... but there is not in fact, and I have worked with counsellors over the fact that we remain in an unhealthy holding pattern, or risk “going out of the frying pan into the fire”, because he wouldn’t cope with either abandonment or revealing his condition.

My way of stopping spiralling or intrusive ruminating about it is distraction.  I have thrown myself into art studies and other forms of self-care, but if these aren’t available I will watch a movie, do a jigsaw puzzle, go for a walk with headphones and music, call a friend, visit the zoo, clean something ..... in other words, get very busy and that usually gets me out of that head space.

Chatting here on the forums helps too, and being amongst friendships I have made here, with people who understand the challenges involved.

Welcome to the forums 👋

[MDT]

Hey Shazo. @Shaz51

I am sorry to hear this my awesome friend. You are a great forumite 🙂

In terms of coping lately distraction has helped a lot. Also priorities and figuring out what needs doing before what. I have limited time like we all do so I figure out what tasks need doing and how much attention each things needs.

[MDT]

What normally works? @Shaz51

[Molliex]

Hi @Faith-and-Hope  thank you for your thoughtful reply.

I also try and distract myself with hobbies, outings, work etc., and often it works. At the moment my depression is so bad that I just don't have the energy to do some of those things, eventhough i know they help.

I'm going to a family wedding this weeknd for the entire weekend and I'm positively tied up in knots thinking about how I am going to get through it without drinking too much. Smile, make coversation, stop thinking those thoughts.

The forum seems very supportive, so I am glad to have found it.

[Molliex]

Hi @MDT @Shaz51 

I have been doing ACT therapy with my psychologist and I am trying really hard to focus on whatever task I am doing, and give it my full attention. I am trying hard to figure out what my values are/what's important to me - i was completed stumped when asked this in therapy. This is all so new for me. I am trying really hard, but gosh I am just so tired x