Hi all
Hams here making a new post
You know I think this year has been hard on all of us. But I think I forgot how it affected me on a personal level.
In February after completing an internship I had a few networking events lined up. I had some references. I also had some stuff published. That was pretty cool.
Of course in March I had some planned events to go to but they fell through due to corona.
I also met a girl on a dating app and we had a few Skype chats. But she had to move to a different city. That was pretty bad for me. I thought there was something that could transpire but it didn't. It is the second time it happened to me actually. The first time was during 2018/19 when I couldn't return to Poland.
There was also my Colombian friend who had her own issues in life and how that had impacted her. It was a testable friendship at times. I guess it is in the past now. But it did hit me hard. The impact that her ex had on her was damaging. Then for her to be harassed by some random guy she just met when right next to me was another level entirely. I was happy that I chose to intervene. But it was exhausting.
Then I was working all through corona as if nothing had happened or changed in the world. I was placed in some situations I hated with a passion. A low key job that was made harder by bad colleagues. Lots of politics, personality clashes, pettiness etc. Add to that the fact that there is a divide between boomers and millennial in my workplaces and its a recipe for who knows what.
I made the choice to go back to work. It was a hard choice. I remember getting really stressed and upset about it this year because I didn't know what to do. But I went back with the knowledge that I'd be challenged and I guess I have met that challenge head on and defeated it by just going back, but also needing to help others who were new.
I am unsure what to do in my life next. I have been thinking about maybe going and doing a law degree. Working near that industry in my current role has made me see that field in a new light. I must also balance that with my desire to move out. Maybe I even need to start looking for a new job.
Currently my coworkers are hard to put up with. One won't stop asking very personal questions and keeps looking at me.. If he crosses the line at any point i need to be ready to deploy my defences and take it to the next level if need be. The other is fussy and doesn't listen. A great deal of patience is required for that.
I saw my p doc yesterday and he doesn't want to see me till January which was good to hear. Seeing as a few months ago I was about to quit work and I had SI...
We are nearly in November. Who knows what is next i guess.
I'm reminded of a quote from Seneca that I read recently
"Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity"
Maybe that describes 2020 for me the best.
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