Lived Experience Forum

[Scream58]

The last week has been a particularly tough one for me.

• A really hard therapy session
• I let a friend down because I was busy mentally preparing myself for the therapy session
• I got a call from someone trying to contact my son who I haven't seen or had contact with for three years
• I was told by the tyre repairer that the tyres on my ute are not compliant and insurance probably wouldn't cover me if I had an accident. Turned out he was wrong but the anxiety button was pushed
• My daughter in law and granddaughter both got COVID. They are both asthmatics. 

I am able to cope when I get hit with a couple of things but this was too much and on Sunday I self harmed for the first time in ages.

With the pressure valve released I was able to function normally yesterday but this morning I feel my mood slipping again. 

[moxi]

What an overwhelming week @Scream58 

I can hear that you're really doing your best to keep on top of things despite all these challenges.  Do you have any safety plans that you can use to look after yourself today? 

[Appleblossom]

Yeah a lot of triggers @Scream58 

Finding healthy ways of coping makes a difference.  Do you like bushwalking or other activities?

Sending best wishes for your granddaughter and her mother.  Hope they get through it without needing hospitalisation, despite the asthma.  So many are getting omicron.  My son and I had it earlier this year.  

Take Care

[Scream58]

@Appleblossom @moxi 

I took what I call a radio silence day. No technology other than TV, quiz shows only.

I love bushwalking but my arthritis prevents it these days. Three years ago I was walking 10-25 kms every day so not being able to that now frustrates me. 

I've spent the day in my PJs so I don't get tempted to go to the bottle shop & get wine. Drinking would be a really bad idea right now.

I have an appointment with my social worker tomorrow so hopefully talking to her will help, certainly can't hurt.

[ButterflyBeauty]

Hello @Scream58,

Thank you for reaching out and sharing honestly where you are at with our community! It takes great courage and strength. I hope that you find the support that you are looking for here.

It sounds like an incredibly challenging week that you have navigated and I would like to acknowledge the recovery demonstrated by being able to take a self care day and log off all devices. Whilst you may have had the thoughts or impulses, you have not acted on them and this is a great measure of strength. Do you have a safety plan or supports you reach out to in these moments?

It sounds like you have a good support network and it is positive that you are meeting with your social worker tomorrow. Please shout out in this thread should you need anything further from the community. I am sure that life will become easier than it has been this week, but in the meantime we are here to hold your hand through the more difficult times.

Thank you

ButterflyBeauty

[Gwynn]

Hey @Scream58 , I’m sorry to hear that you were overwhelmed yesterday and you released the pressure in a harmful way.  I must admit, though, I’m impressed by your safety mechanism of staying in your pjs to prevent you from buying alcohol. Hopefully your girls will get better soon.  

[Appleblossom]

@Scream58 

I too liked the pjs as a preventative for going to bottle shop. Harm minimisation.

It must be frustrating not to keep up the same level of activity as you are used to.  I found that I still have to keep moving cos the arthritis gets worse if I stop.  Doing stretches etc etc ... 

Hope you find forum people you relate to, and join on other threads if you like.