Lived Experience Forum

[Therealme1]

Guess this is my attempt to find somebody that actually understands or gets it im a 21 year old male and through out school and even after i was popular friends with everyone Had girlfriends and all that stuff yet i always just felt empty, alone and numb no matter what i do ive tried therapy hobbies lifestyle changes but nothing helps the feeling never goes away no matter what i do. I dont wanna give up but like what else is there left to do i dont think i can continue feeling this way for much longer its only getting harder and harder as all that people can say is it will get better but it never does.

[Dockers6]

Therealme1,

Your words are heard.

You're pain and sufferance's are heard, and I can assure you the struggle you have been experiencing over your time will be met with some amazing humans on this forum, who get it, and can provide you with some direction, further meaning in this space. 

From my end, I'm one of the moderators on this forum, and can assure you, you are heard.

Dockers6

[NatureLover]

Hi and welcome, @Therealme1 , it's good you've joined.

It sounds to me like you may be experiencing depression? I'm sorry to hear. 

I wonder how you would feel about seeing your GP and telling them how you're feeling? They may suggest a medication which would help to remove the hopelessness and make you feel better? Or they may have other ideas which might help. 

You do have options, you don't have to feel like this forever. 

A handy forum tip is if you type @ it tags the person you're replying to. 

Wishing you all the best. 

[Therealme1]

@NatureLover ive seen multiple therapists and all that sort of stuff and been perscribed stuff before and it helps in the moment sometimes but it never changes how i feel or gets rid of that feeling which i suppose is why I feel like im running out of options

[Appleblossom]

@Therealme1 

Hello

I like your name.  Have you felt like you have been masking your real feelings to fit in.  I have done that a lot.  Not to the point of being false, but to the point of feeling uncomfortable with myself.  I have a much shorter fuse now ... and speaking my mind much more often ...which terrifies me .....but still a pretty long fuse ... my bark is probably way worse than my bite.

I am going to tag some younger forumites to see if they can join in your thread.

@outlander @oceangirl @MDT @Jacques 

I 

[MDT]

Hi there @Therealme1

Welcome to the forum

I think your feelings of empty and alone are common here. But probably more common in everyday life as well - more than most would care to imagine or think.

What do you do for yourself to cope?

I have had depression and anxiety for a number of years - there are always ways to fix it and deal with it as we go through life.

It's hard being young these days too - so much is out there to get our attention and keep it so that we may be able to divert away from how we feel and what we really care for.

I am glad you reached out tonight though.

Chuck @ in front of a user's name so we can be notified of your updates if you want to make some

I hope to see you aorund

[Former-Member]

@Therealme1 I'm sorry to hear this. I agree with you, life sucks! I hope you find a lot of supporters in these forums to make you feel less alone. Your situation sounds difficult and I hope it does work out for you in the end.
Just wondering if you've tried finding a psychiatrist? There's a long wait list for one at the moment. Also do you have a list of activities or things to do to make you feel temporarily like you're in control each day? I hope you're all right!

[Former-Member]

@Therealme1 meds never take away problems they just help us cope. Sometimes you just gotta grit your teeth and pull through. I'm not trying to appear bossy at all, but sometimes a good support network is what will help. I don't know what's best for you so I'm sorry if I'm not seeming supportive enough, I'm just trying at this point to console you and hope for the best for you.

[Lou2u]

HEy Therealme1 

I really relate to what you are saying and identify with that "sense' 'feeling' 'experience' of feeling numb and lonely. 

What eventually worked for me was joining many peer groups AA, NA, Alt2su, GROW, eGROW where I met others that related to what I was trying to express and articulate 

Another thing I did was lots of Diary writing so I got a really good sense of self and who I was - Some call this an identity 

This gave me anchors I could refer back to as what I found for me (and I can only speak to what happens from behind my eyes) was that what I thought was happening and what was really happening in reality were on occasions not in sink with each other 

I also had to learn that a feeling is not always a fact and learning how to sit with and be aware of my internal experiences changed my relationship with them 

In a nut shell that these feeling would come and go (Think how clouds roll by overhead) I now welcome feelings/moods that are now more like a friend ive come to know rather that a feeling that i cant tolerate at any cost 

I found for me also that moods are much the same ie, they eventually pass

All this dosen't really help much I know but it may give you a few clues I have a classic trauma Brain so even though I want to be alone its healing for me to be around like minded people that maybe experiencing similar things 

For me I found these people in Peer groups and they taught me to hang in there try different things until I found what works for me and really loved me back into health wellbeing and connectedness 

Its great your reaching out keep doing this take a few positive risks and see how things unfold I wish you well finding what you need and encourage you to keep reaching out!

Remember if we want to find butterflies we need to go were they hang out and practice being with/connecting with them in a meaningful way

Keep going hang in there IT works IF you Work IT! :-)))))))))))

[BearShark]

It is okay...it is okay to feel like this as I have been down this path, however it took me a long time to acknowledge, understand and be able to reach out for help. Like yourself I was popular at school, very successful in all sports...yet always felt alone, like I didn't fit in or belong anywhere. This only intensified after school.

Happy to help where ever possible.

Some suggestions for you:

1. Ask yourself (honestly) is there any traumatic event that you have experienced or witnessed. For me, this was the key, something that I was trying to forget / avoid at all costs.

2. Reach out to support groups - Kidsline, Lifeline and others.

3. Seek out a counsellor to discuss what you are feeling / experiencing.

4. There is a group Marcus Mission - which can provide you with a Mentor who will work with you. I am a Mentor with them and it is a free and comfortable arrangement, totally driven by you as to how much contact and the frequency of get togethers.

Hope this helps and as I said I am happy to help where ever possible.

Do not give up...you have already shown that you are brave and amazing, by reaching out on this forum.

cheers bearshark