issues with support worker

[Eden1919]

so tonight i had a support worker come over as usual and i have had them before anyway i was struggling to talk today like i physically could hardly speak and this happens to me form time to time and i have told this support worker on a number of occasions that i cant speak sometimes and she had said that is fine well not today it wasnt she threatened to call an ambulance and said that "if you dont start talking i will have to draw my own conclusions" and said that i needed to "give her something" and she knows calling an ambulance is a waste of time and i managed to squeek that out and she just said "well once i call them it isnt my problem what happens after i have a duty of care" and like i was getting upset which made it harder to talk i eventually managed to send her out for the last hour to get me some food and supplies so that i didnt have to keep trying to talk to her and i just idk what i am supposed to do about this like i cant just stop working with her and i have begged for the office to give my support workers more mental health training but it never happens and now it looks like it will fall on my shoulders to have to have a serious talk with her about my needs and such because she honestly made me feel unsafe today and i just idk what to do i am already going through a really though patch and am really struggling and i dont have the energy to deal with this on top of everything. not to mention a pet peeve i have is she says people with mental issues not mental health issues and it just comes off as a little derogatory and i just wish she would use better language sometimes but she is older so idk it is hard. and what should i do about this how do i express myself without her getting mad at me cause historically when i have tried to address stuff with support workers they have doubled down and blamed me and told me i was the problem no matter how nicely i approach the issue like i literally said to one of them that "i think we are having communication issues" and i was met with "you arent even trying it is your fault and you need to try harder to make me more comfortable" so like idk how to approach this without getting spat on.   

[Star121]

It sounds like you are really good at expressing yourself through writing, do you think you could use a Microsoft Word document to communicate when you are struggling to verbally? All the best.

[Vyv]

@Eden1919 I reckon @Star121 gives great advice. As I was reading your post I was thinking how well you were articulating the problem. I would include in a document some links to info on shutdowns and how people can support you when you're in shutdown. It's so disappointing to hear the people who are suppose to be supporting you aren't listening. Do you have a metal health professional you see who might be able to advocate for you, or contribute something in a letter? Best of luck with it. I know constant advocacy work to get your needs met is tough. 

[Appleblossom]

Hey @Eden1919 

Hearing you about difficulties with support worker. 

I am pretty vulnerable and work hard getting along with my support workers. I had 2 who were not a good fit. I tend not to trust my own feelings and instincts. Only learning late in life to challenge or have expectations that I am worthy as a person and allowed to be alive.  I have had 2 good support workers, both very different, so I couldn't give you a recipe for what works... But trying to give you hope... That if you let go of one that isn't working... You may be pleasantly surprised. Their job is supporting YOU after all. Good luck with it