Lived Experience Forum

[JessesGal]

Hi everyone, 

I am new here. I am currently studying Cert IV in Mental Health Peer Work. Today, when I was out with a friend prioritising my self-care and relaxing, I was unexpectedly triggered. We were in a public place and I saw my nephew. He is my younger brother's eldest son and he's a teenager. I know it was definitely him because he's very distinct looking and has very recognisable features. I was less than 2 metres away from him for about half an hour. Tonight, I was sitting here thinking about how I saw him and I just started crying and couldn't stop. My own nephew was so close I could see the colour of his eyes, and he had no idea who I was and that breaks my heart. I thought about saying something at the time, but he hasn't seen me in about 8 years and I didn't want to freak him out. My little brother has AOD issues and there is a lot of childhood trauma there. He has not been a good father. He hasn't been a father at all. I just started thinking that it's not just the kids (he has 4 of various ages) and him who have missed out. I have too. I have a niece who is about 4 or 5 that I've never even met. I so badly wanted to say something. I'm not really sure how to handle the unexpected trigger and the emotions its brought up. I'm so angry at my brother, and I'm so sad for the kids and myself. These are challenges I've faced over and over again in my past, and I thought I'd healed from it all, but it really came out of nowhere and buckled me at the knees. We spend so much time in our course talking about trauma and being retraumatised and triggers, but we don't actually spend all that much time discussing what to do when it happens to us. I would like to know your thoughts and suggestions please. Thank you. PS - trying to make contact with the kids is not an option unfortunately due to my brother's colourful coping mechanisms. 

[tyme]

Hey @JessesGal ,

Thank you for sharing. With trauma, acknowledging the trauma is there is a start. Well done on reflecting on what’s happened.

I too experience this and really, literally breathe through it. I’m hoping to speak to a professional about it. With work in mental health, it doesn’t mean you are ‘perfect’ when you work. All are capable of being triggered. You are not alone. Now it’s about getting the professional support you need.

[Asgard]

Hi @JessesGal 

I am doing the Cert IV Mental Health Peer Work course myself, so I kinda can relate to your story.  Triggers are everywhere, but good for you being able to reflect on them.  In the course we get to know all the theory, but putting things into practice thats where the real learning is.  Could you talk with your course supervisor about it, I had a triggering moment which left me a blubbering mess, and I spoke with my supervisor.  He managed to put things into perspective for me.

So I hear you and good luck with the course