Lived Experience Forum

[AEB]

So there is this dr and she helps patients with CEN. These are 4 things people go to her for help with.

The first challenge was that they felt invisible, like they didn’t belong or had no value to anyone.

The second challenge people needed help with is that they had trouble recognizing their emotions or sharing their emotions with others.

The third challenge was that they had trouble determining their needs and desires because they couldn’t connect with themselves.

And the fourth challenge they faced was having trouble setting boundaries or struggled saying “no” to others.

i struggle with all of these issues and they have made a significant impact on my life. My relationship has fallen apart because of me. I have to find a way to move on and get the help I need to help me to overcome this and become stronger. Hopefully I can fix this relationship later down the track. 

[destructive]

@AEB sorry you struggle with this. I don’t really remember a lot of growing up but these are all struggles for me too. That’s rough. Are you seeing this lady?

[AEB]

@destructive  no not currently seeing this lady but I get a lot of emails from her with lots of useful information. I also have some of her books too.

[Appleblossom]

Hello @AEB 

I experienced serious childhood neglect and relate to those 4 issues, as did my siblings.  Thanks for posting them so clearly.  Most of the uselful therapy I have had to seek out myself in libraries, including top medical libraries, before the world of the internet. Now of course there is a lot of material online, as well as this new evolving way to meet others, share and exchange info.

Welcome

Cheers Apple

[Shaz51]

@AEB, wondering if you are talking about Emotionally and Mentally abused which i was from my faher when i was growing up ?????

[AEB]

@Shaz51  Yeah that would probably be very similar as well

[Shaz51]

Yes it has affected  my life @AEB , @Appleblossom , @destructive 

Even though mum and I left when I was 11  but since living in a  s.mall country town I was rejected  continually  by my father until he passed away when I was 42 

[AEB]

@Shaz51  Yeah that’s really rough. There is a questionnaire by a dr Jonice Webb you should be able to find easily and see if you are suffering from childhood emotional neglect. 

It actually just helps helps a little bit to put a name to all these things we are feeling and to know that it’s actually really normal and that you can be healed from this

[Powderfinger]

@AEB @Shaz51 @Appleblossom @destructive 

I was abused by both parents. On every level except sexusl. Speaking just about the make species of supposed "caregivers" (can't say the F word) I don't feel I can ever fully heal from him. I hope that for others here this is possible. It went on till I was 30 before I cut him out of my life indefinitely. 

He certainly did a very good job of making me feel like an inconvenience if that was his intention. Intention or not, it's how I felt. By the time he got around to saying, I love you, it was too late. Too much damage. Too hard to even believe it. I still believe to this day, he never really loved me. I suppose out of the copious memories I have, is my mother telling me in front of him at 12 years old that "your father does not love you", in front of him. He never said a word. That memory alone says it all. I've never gotten over it and possibly never will. 

The fact is, I don't actually love him either. There's nothing to love. I feel empty and nothing. 

Anyhow, I hope for all of you, healing is possible. Some people just can't. 

[AEB]

@Powderfinger  I’m sorry that has happened to you. I completely agree you probably won’t fully heal for that but there are parts that you can heal from this. There is a lot of work to be done but it is possible.