Lived Experience Forum

[Former-Member]

I have just returned from my local hospital after watching my daughter having four seizures and nearly losing her life due to taking too many anti depressants. We found out that she had been treated abusively by her boyfriend, recently had a miscarriage and he left her for dead. It pushed her over the edge.
The doctors told us it's a miracle she is alive due to the huge amount of drugs she took. Each seizure she went blue and frothed of the mouth. Traumatising to watch to say the least - I really thought I lost her. The doctors have detained (scheduled) her under the mental health ward of the hospital under the mental health act. Now hopefully it will give her the time and proper help to heal. The staff, nurses and doctors have been wonderful and compassionate.
My daughter hugged me as I left this evening saying sorry for what she put me through.
I would like to say to anyone who suffers low self esteem and is in a abusive relationship to never put up with it. You deserve better and no one is worth harming yourself over.
I think I am still in shock but must pull myself together to support my daughter through this. A mammoth task. Any moral support right now or advice from anyone else who has suffered similarly or not would be appreciated. If I could have but one wish in my life right now it would be to see my daughter heal, whole within herself, happy and loved. That's all I want in this life now.

[Former-Member]

I can't even imagine what you are going through right now @Former-Member. It's something no one should have to go through. 

Please make sure you are taking good care of yourself over the next few days? I know it will be hard to prioritise- but you can't help your daughter unless you are looking after yourself as well. We will be thinking of you and sending you healing thoughts for you and your daughter. 

I love your message to others about self-esteem and abusive relationships. I think it's really hard for some people to see their true worth and beauty in this world- it's very sad. I hope everyone on the Forums takes your message to heart, it's so true.

All the best @Former-Member 

[Former-Member]

Oh I'm so sorry @Former-Member. I can't imagine how you feel right now. I don't have any words of wisdom but as a survivor of a few attempts it sounds like she's in the best place with good help available. There is a good chance she'll survive this to go on and become stronger. Thinking of you, sending best wishes💜😊💐

[Former-Member]

Oh @Former-Member, this is big, the worry alone must be overwhelming for you. But seeing her fit, horrible. Now I know what my mum felt when I tried in my 20s (its been a no go topic in my family).

You have the best attitude & your girl is safe for now, so please, please look after yourself, tonight especially. Maybe let out some tension with exercise, screaming into your pillow? at God? Scrubbing the sink...

Is there someone to talk to?? It helps to debrief soon after a trauma such as this, and sooner than later, and even if its lifeline, even if only for 10min, and again for another 10min later with a different person.

Both my 2 breakdown (& parasuicide) were within 6months after major loss. The last one my daughter, the first one a miscarriage. I really believe the grief would be affecting your girl even if she's not facing it. How long ago was the miscarriage? The hormone shift alone would be messing with mood & stability. (I use to be a midwife).
Just love her, and find a good psychologist.
So sorry this is happening to your family. Hugs!

[Former-Member]

Thank you @Former-Member and @Former-Member for your support and wise words right now - it's helping and warmly received. Thank you for the comfort - I really needed to get this off my chest and release it as I can show no sign of distress in front of my family. I am the cornerstone of the family. Thank you @Former-Member for giving me hope - I need it by the ton right now. You said absolutely the right thing and I believe you - helped more than you know. Very grateful xxxxxxxxxx

[Former-Member]

Thank you @Former-Member

Seeing my daughter fit was soul destroying - shock set in as I really thought I lost her. She went blue - frightened the nurses/doctors. It was touch and go - My inner turmoil was overwhelming. It was a miracle she survived.

i have no one to talk to in real life, that's why I reached out here and am so glad I did. I can't scream as for the sake of the family I have to remain strong and upbeat.

My daughters miscarriage was three days ago - the boyfriend has been treating her beyond cruel. It got too much. I think now she is seeing what type of a person he really is and spoke of moving on - but she has a way to go before healing.

Thank you for your kind words. Sorry to read that you have suffered similarly. To know that you have come through so gives me strength. Thank you so much for your kindness and support xxxxxx

[Former-Member]

Here if you want to keep chatting
Theres a lot of help for survivers of suicide out there, not sure if they do parasuicide (but they should if theyre into prevention). Just think you would benefit ringing. Talking too.
tonight would be a great time to debrief.

Your daughter survived for a reason. I really hope she gets some 1:1 counselling in hospital (I didn't the last 4wk admission - felt like a caged animal. Also had no family visitors (all interstate), i was so lonely & felt abandoned and frightened (even of myself & being alone), its so important you show her, and the MH staff you are there for her. That's all I really wanted in hospital, for people important to prop up my worth for a while. I didn't get that & don't know how I survived, except that I've helped a few people along the way.

Hang in there. Its OK to cry.

[utopia]

@Former-Member. @Grateful90 just posted regarding overcoming this exact thing - from his own experience. Please have a read - it's a positive message of hope.
I'm sending my love to you and your daughter. yes You need all your strength to help your daughter, but please don't neglect your own health.
I asked to be admitted to hospital after some scary SI thoughts in May this year. You wouldn't know it to see me now. I'm healing & I'm stronger.
There is life - a great life - possible after a suicide attempt.
Thinking of you

[Appleblossom]

@Former-Member I did not read this til now.

To walk with people you love in such a state .. is beyond horrific ..

One of the reasons I try and reduce the divide between the sexes .. is cos it seems worse these days not better .. and thats tragic for a lot of people.

Thinking of your daughter and family and YOU.

[Sahara]

My dear @Former-Member, 

I can't imagine how terrible this must be for you.... I'm glad you have the support of the doctors and nurses. I hope your daughter will come out the other side of this with renewed hope in life..... as you say, it really is a miracle that she survived and I think God must be looking out for her. 

May angels walk beside you and comfort you in your need.