@RiverSeal  thank you much appreciated

 @QueenB81 I am sorry to hear that you understand the dance well and just how much it can hurt. The work that I am doing at the moment is about allowing the inner child out and learning how to reparent myself in away that should have always been demonstrated. 

@Asgard  The rescripting has already done amazing things for what I have experiences and dealt with but does not mean there is still not a lot of work to do.  

Today I am just feeling so defeated and not entirely sure why is my responsibly to heal from this anyways- maybe I am just frustrated among a billion other emotions. Thankfully its therapy week this week. Since this episode its the first time we have pushed the session out to fortnightly. 

Everything hurts, mind, body, soul and part of me that I didn't even know existed. 

I just keep repeating the same things over and over about how hurt and sad I am. 

everything is tired. 

I feel like I cant find my feet on the forums and withhold from responding to others- I know I will find my feet eventually (hopefully).