@Captain24 wanna take a couple deep breaths for me? And see if you can't gently remind yourself that black & white thinking is a normal trauma response, but it doesn't represent the truth? 

Two things can be true. You can hate yourself, and I can also be very fond of you and value you quite highly. Both of those things are correct. 

My cats get on my nerves when I'm dysregulated too, it's normal. I sometimes just chuck a handful of treats at them to try to shut them up! Maybe not for Pix tho, her poor tum! Maybe what Pix wants is just to comfort you? 

I'm hearing how loud the thoughts are hun. What do you think will help you in staying safe tonight? Here beside you 💜