And you are probably very right @tyme maybe I can’t help then but I can lead by example i guess 

Being in their prescence stresses me out but I hope I can model what’s good from afar 

I stayed at brothers house a couple of times last week and i went home on the second night because I felt extremely uncomfortable and unsafe my 4 year old nephew who I have only met twice was running around while my brother just sat there not even caring about anything it was like being at my parents house all those years ago 

Ugh I just feel sick about having to spend any time with them there’s a reason I keep an arms length from all of them, I know I’m not perfect either 

and I have just been doing this all on my own because I didn’t want my partner to be involved in all of this she shouldnt have to be 

Im emotionally drained