@RedHorse 

I'm not very good at replying to long posts because my brain can only hold a little at a time currently. 

Thanks for sharing. I'm on DSP. It isn't enough. As a result of her I got into debt. I want to clear it. I was under so much control. I couldn't breathe without her wondering how many breaths I took in one minute. An example of the serious control. 

As for NDIS. I wasn't interested in it when it came out and am still not interested. I've seen to much drama and stress other people go through and I didn't want to become dependant on it. 

As for my business, I'm sticking with it. I'm established in my career. It's just that my business went south because I couldn't work as a result of her control, possessiveness and not allowing me to work. Then I really had a very severe meltdown. I had my only friend stay with me for a month because I was suicidal. It's all I thought about for weeks. I wouldn't be here if she didn't stay for that time. I still am 50% suicidal on most days. 

I know it's not right for me to be working at all right now. I'm stuck, I need the money so I don't have much choice in it. I will just have to take small jobs instead of big projects I usually take and maybe one at a time. I'm so angry with how she has destroyed me and my life.