@Former-Member 

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but when my emotions come out things get incredibly intense really fast.

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As someone who never talked to anyone about anything until about 18 months ago, i have experienced a similar thing.  I'll intend to just say one personal thing to a counselor (it's all still very new to me), but everything just comes pouring out and I don't even think to try and stop it until i'm done.  I feel like an idiot after and like i made a fool of myself.  But I always feel better for doing it.  Half the time, when I go back I do it all again! 😁

It's really helped me to tell someone my feelings, frustrations, and pain.  I still always feel embarrassed afterwards and tell myself "Okay.. we have to stop doing that!" but I now try to look at it as that is the old me talking.  The me that bottled everything up and never shared anything.  So when i feel that same embarrassment every time, i tell that me to bugger off!  That me was never any help, and yeah, made things easier by ignoring everything, but never made things better.

The last appointment I had with my post adoption support counselor I noticed there was a 2nd box of tissues on the table.  I'm still not sure if that was a direct result of our previous session or not! 🤣