I am new here but felt I needed an outlet to post. I have been in a relationship for 14 years but for 6 of those I have been cheating on my partner. I have no explanations as to why and always thought I was just toxic and a liar. But this year it came to light that I have borderline personality disorder. Only recently has my partner found out about all my lies and cheating and I feel horrible that I did that. But I also feel like I had no control over myself. I don’t condone what I did and I despise my actions. I just don’t know how to explain to her what I did was all about my own feelings and not her.
Is your partner sticking by you? If they are, you are lucky. For their sake and your own, please get help. Get into a psychologist, get the support and learn the tools to stop what you are doing and to better understand yourself.
