Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[Robati]

Hi all , my partner has left with my four children overseas , it was my fault I had an episode an Asked her to leave next mornin she left the country , I didn't think she would go . I never got to say goodbye to my kids as she had checked in before I got to the airport . Now I'm reading through the forums , an hav spoken to helpline , she has done this before an that's what I couldn't get over so when she came back it was something that I brought up a lot which lead to arguments . I know it's over between us but the thought of not been around to see my kids jus bloody painful . Maybe writing all this down knowing someone will read it helps me . I'm known for being an angry person but really split personalities I can be really nice too. .jus feeling down at the moment . No idea where to start !

[Janna]

Hi and Welcome to the forum 😊

I'm very sorry to hear about the most recent turn of events in your personal life.  The thing that strikes me most is your open acknowledgement of your behaviour, which to me indicates that you possess insight.  Having insight is the first step towards resolving your own behavioural issues.  Many people do not possess this.  They never, ever see that they were in the wrong and shift blame externally.  It takes courage to admit that you are an "angry person" and that your behaviour was a contributing factor towards what has happened. The fact that you are showing remorse and can see your shortcomings is the best you can do for now, but this may not be enough to convince your partner that similar scenarios will not happen again in the future. The most positive thing you can do for yourself and your family is to seek some sort of professional help (e.g. psychologist) for your anger issues.  Your wife and children need to have a safe home environment in all respects.  Children can be profoundly affected if they live in a domestic environment which is studded with parental disagreement.  If you seek help, and show a genuine and sustained committment to work on your problems, your partner may be more forgiving and consider returning.  You may also wish to seek some legal advice regarding her leaving the country with your children without your consent.  I'm not too sure about this but it may constitute what is known as "international parental abduction".  

All the best

Janna

[Robati]

@Janna thanks a lot for your response , much appreciated yes first step will be to see gp then psychologist , an will differently look into that child abduction . She is Australian so I'm still unsure how it works . Amazing advice an encouragement , God bless

[NikNik]

Hi @Robati
How are you travelling?
I hope you're doing okay.
Nik