Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[Rivulet]

Hi @BillyBird, I'm sorry to hear that. 😞 I know how difficult it is when you sibling suddenly gets angry and no longer wants to talk to you. I'm definitely not the best person to ask for advice as I'm currently experiencing a similar situation where my sister is angry, paranoid and very alert about her siblings and parents but I would suggest keeping up with contacting your brother to see how he's going every now and then just to check on him and to make sure he's ok? I don't know if it's the correct way to approach this, but maybe ask him if he wants to just sit together and talk, so you can understand why he is angry at you and your family?

Can I ask what types of attempts you've made or how you've approached your brother in the past? This might help others who might have more experience with this in understanding your situation better so they can give advice.

[BPDSurvivor]

So good to hear from you @Rivulet ,

Please do not be too hard on yourself. The 'rejection' is not from your sister but rather, her illness.

Mental Illness recovery takes time. By nature, it has ups and downs. Things may go well for a season, then there may be a hiccup. The main thing is that you have an action plan in place to support you during these times. Being equipped and prepared will support you for when things get tough.

I do sincerely hope your sister will feel better soon.

Look after yourself.

BPDSurvivor

[Rivulet]

Thank you so much @BPDSurvivor ! We really appreciate your kind words and support. My family and I will definitely do our best to support my sister through this 🙂 Please take care as well! 

[Schitzo]

Hi @BillyBird  welcome to the forums. 

I'm sorry you are having trouble with your brother.

Does he see a psychiatrist and/or psychologist?

He may need a medication review.

I would suggest giving your brother some space when he is angry. You need to put your safety first.

Always remember that your brother loves you, he's just got a lot going at the moment.

I can tell you from experience that time heals all wounds. I have schitzophenia and had a similar situation with my sister.

I wish you all the best 🍀💚xx

[BillyBird]

Hi Schitzo, Thank you for your reply. I have decided to leave him alone for a few weeks and then try again. I so appreciated your reminder that he still loves me. Despite his angry rebukes via text (he never picks up voice calls) he does not block me or ignore. This gives me a little hope. Can you describe the challenge our folk with schizophrenia have in processing difficult emotions?

[Former-Member]

@BillyBird 

Quick forum tip to use the @ symbol to 'tag' someone so they know you have responded @Schitzo ^^

[Schitzo]

 @Former-Member, Thanks for the tip.💚🌺 xx

[Former-Member]

@Schitzo , main thing is you got @BillyBird 's message.

[Schitzo]

Hi @BillyBird 

The challenges we have in processing difficult emotions are we have voices in our head 24/7 and as hard as our families try, they can't reach us as the voices, visions and smells are all consuming.

Some of the voices are friendly, others are evil and sinister and threaten us and our loved ones. To us the things we hear, see and smell are very real. Your brothers is anger is more than likely his way of dealing with it. As well as hearing voices,he would almost certainly see hallucinations as well as smell things ( when I was psychotic I heard voices, saw ghosts and smelled dead bodies).

Is he taking his medication?

If not I would suggest you ring the CATT or the mental health triage number. He may need to go to hospital.

I hope this helps, I know how hard this is for you . I'm glad your brother has such a loving family.

Take care 

Schitzo 🌷xx

[BillyBird]

Dear @Schitzo, So grateful for your explanation. It is difficult to understand what my brother may be experiencing. Your description is really helpful. He has never been able to talk about his experiences. I get rare little bits of info from time to time. I think it is easy for other family members to forget that he has these challenges and possibly a little afraid.

 I believe my brother is taking his medication. Although I think a review is needed. He has experienced a couple of traumatic events in the last year (our father died and a court appearance) and he isn't coping. Part of not coping is rejecting people. 
In February the lashing out began. Myself and siblings all got very concerned that he may be having a psychotic episode. After lots of discussion we thought it best to contact his psychiatrist. This was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do! I felt intrusive and worried how he would take it. My worse fears eventuated. He has less trust in me. 
At the moment I can only hope his anger will dissipate in time. I have promised myself to make contact every couple of weeks. He seems to be comfortable with sms.

I search for the best words and approach but seem to stuff up each time. Any advice how to talk to him?

Much love and gratitude to share all this.

BillyBird 💚