Back again checking in

[Lilly6]

Hi. Thank you for your posts and emails just thought I would check in. I am still here for the moment, don't worry about me. I appreciate your concern. I still don't think there is anything out there for me though. I have plans in place. For now though I am here. 
I hope you are all well and going along great. This forum has some really great people and is very supportive. 💜

[NatureLover]

Hi @Lilly6 , am happy to see you 🙂

Thanks for checking in... I do worry about you, but that's OK, I can handle my worry about you.

Is there any way we can best support you through your SI?

[Former-Member]

Hi @Lilly6 

It's really wonderful to see you here and thanks for checking in. It's lovely that you care for your community members here and can see how much they care for you through their own support.

I understand that you continue to be going through a really tough time and so I've sent you an email to check-in and I want to gently remind you that we are all sitting with you through this.

Warmest Regards,

Basil.

[Lilly6]

Thanks @Former-Member 

[Lilly6]

Thanks @NatureLover I appreciate that. No way to best support me, your current support does help. That being said I know that posts containing SI are distressing so I won't post much more. 

[NatureLover]

Please do continue to post, @Lilly6  - that way we know how you're doing. 

And don't worry - a lot of people on here have SI, sadly...I'm not distressed by your posts, although I am concerned.

Thinking of you...I'm still wishing for some hope and healing for you. 🙂

[BlueBay]

I was hsppy to see you check in here @Lilly6  

Take care ❤️❤️

[outlander]

thinking of you @Lilly6

[Lilly6]

Thanks @NatureLover 

At the risk of sounding hopeless and pathetic I don't think there is any hope or healing for me. Don't be concerned about me though. What will be will be ☺️ 

[Lilly6]

Today I feel so so down, just awful. So tired of feeling this way. I saw my therapist this week again or rather by phone and not sure if is helping yet. She is big on mindfulness whereas I want to to talk more about my feelings as is probably obvious in my posts. To me mindfulness is like putting a bandaid on the problem although I know it helps some people. I have implemented a couple of the things she said like controlled breathing as that helps a bit. Helped heaps last night when I was super anxious. 
I know a small very small part of me is still hopeful but the majority of me is not. I so want this all to be over with.