Coming to terms with reality

[Former-Member]

in reply to your latest post

yes I am the same as you ...I feel for others who are hurting.....

I have in the past put too much effort into others and left myself last....little energy left to give to oneself when last

so am learning....I give a certain amount....politely and respectfully remove myself then...

yes I analyse too....I am just analytical ...my style of thinking...it is who I am...so leave that one as is

empathic as you describe yourself...yes...thank goodness there are people like us @eudemonism @Adek ....we just have to learn to set healthy boundaries

am practising the boundaries

when the thoughts become negative I now stop and think is this my old style thinking? if so....start changing the wording to more positive....no more putting myself down.....

lastly practise very hard with the philosphy living in the now

well nearly lastly......recognise that I am human....I can make mistakes...slip up sometimes.....I am learning...I am doing something about it

so am smiling....keep on practising smiling....produces seratonin

[eudemonism]

Yea i gotta watch my step around everyone in my life. Otherwise they quickly start sharpening their knives and get ready to stab me in the back at any chance they get. That's how it is too be honest with you. Neighbours. Friends. Family. Church members. Social groups i attend. Everybody worried about my shortcomings and not their own. But it's gotta be somebody they do it too i suppose. (Not all and not all the time )

Does that make sense @Former-Member ? Then on the contrary they use me for everything they can. It's not everybody and not all the time. But it's definitely happening behind my back. Between them. (Mentally tag teaming me with their words and judgments ) And it's like my shortcomings have caused it. And it's like they have no shortcomings. But when they in need of a visitor or to bludge off someone. You guessed it. I'm their number one man. It's types of things like this that get on my nerves and creates stress and nervousness. And make me anxious. I can sense the aura and vibes of these things happening. It's terrible.

But in all honesty. I've done it too them. And i think i done it too them out of retaliation. Fight fire with fire type of thing. And i find stuff in the Bible that basically gives me a second opinon which confirms the whole scenario is true.

I got philosophies and analogies left right and centre in my mind. And it's all based around understanding what's going on. And unfortunately. It don't tell a very nice story. Allows me to laugh at the situations they based around though. And cause i got social issues. And don't have alot to offer the world. It makes it really difficult to change my circumstances. I also feel that they come against me because they know I'm just gonna forgive them anyway. And i think they do it so they know they have power and control over me. In a social hyracy sense. And i never become anything. Good conversation for them also.

Here's something i told myself awhile ago. "The world has always come against me before i have come against it" it's basically like, alot of people out there live their lives according to old testament rules. While I'm doing the new testament thing. And it gives them a human slave that is fearing being deprived of their needs unless they want what is best for their psychological abusers. Not many options really unless i play the old testament game in return.

[eudemonism]

Never had much of a chance if it's all true

[eudemonism]

Preaching forgiveness to the enemy after they've had enough of vicious psychological games which destroy weak and vulnerable people. Whom would do the same to them if given the chance. Then it's a case of walking in the way of Jesus. And we all know how that story ends. But there is the odd perk to the story which makes it worth while.

[eudemonism]

That's all in the mind also

[Adek]

...SIMPLE FORMULA Eh?.. @mohill @eudemonism @Appleblossom

[Adek]

"Hero"

There's a hero
If you look inside your heart
You don't have to be afraid
Of what you are
There's an answer
If you reach into your soul
And the sorrow that you know
Will melt away

And then a hero comes along
With the strength to carry on
And you cast your fears aside
And you know you can survive
So when you feel like hope is gone
Look inside you and be strong
And you'll finally see the truth
That a hero lies in you

It's a long road
When you face the world alone
No one reaches out a hand
For you to hold
You can find love
If you search within yourself
And the emptiness you felt
Will disappear

And then a hero comes along
With the strength to carry on
And you cast your fears aside
And you know you can survive
So when you feel like hope is gone
Look inside you and be strong
And you'll finally see the truth
That a hero lies in you

Lord knows
Dreams are hard to follow
But don't let anyone
Tear them away
Hold on
There will be tomorrow
In time
You'll find the way

And then a hero comes along
With the strength to carry on
And you cast your fears aside
And you know you can survive
So when you feel like hope is gone
Look inside you and be strong
And you'll finally see the truth
That a hero lies in you
That a hero lies in you
That a hero lies in you

[eudemonism]

Im glad i got that off my chest and aint carrying it around no more. Now we can move on.

[eudemonism]

Thanks @Adek that's given something positive to reflect upon. I'm sure you'll be glad to hear that I'm taking steps toward stopping alcohol and becoming sober. Because alcohol use leads to all bad things. Although it's a quick fix. It does alot of damage and leads to heavy smoking and drug use. And I'm slowly learning that I'll have to adapt and make changes for it too work.

I'm interested about how you say the government has sponsored you. Cause i feel it's the same type of thing with me. What's the process where you're from?

The government here has put an incredibly heavy tax on cigarettes. And it increases every 12 months. It's to try and make people stop smoking. A bit unfair for all the people who have been addicted for a long time. And started smoking in their early teens. What's it like in your country?

[eudemonism]

Hey @Former-Member i been walking quite a bit. And have quite a few walking trails i use regularly. It's a great hobby and i really enjoy it. Nothing is quite likea nice walk. I see all sorts of things when I'm strutting ny stuff along one of my walking trails. Floating boats. Birds in the sky. Dogs playing fetch with their owners and swimming. Other people walking their dogs and jogging. Children on play equipment. Rabbits eating grass. The trees blowing in the breeze. Fish in the sea. The clouds in the sky. The sun shining. Flowers in bloom. Cars driving. It's great. I am spoilt for choices when it comes to walking trails.

My dog is doing great. He has a great nature and just wants to play with other dogs. Chase the birds. Get attention from people. Stretch his legs. Play in the water. Sniff around. Then when he's in the backyard he just lies around and sleeps. Whines at me from time to time. Plays fetch. Chews on a bone. Annoys the cat. Have you ever owned a dog? And how's your walking going now that the weather has warmed up?