oRe: Progress..

[Alice10]

@Asgard hi again. Well, what drew me to him was he seemed very capable and very in control of things in a good way. He was also I thought, this is embarrassing..very cool. In a band, etc. But now I realise that I saw in him what I wanted to and chose to see, and boy did I have the blinders on. He's actually revealed himself to be very immature and not very "present" if that makes sense. I feel I'm drifting further and further away from him. He's actually an asshole sometimes, and today I got another verbal attack. You really are a good friend Asgard, because not many people would listen to me going from pillar to post constantly. Take it easy I hope Bunnings has been fun with your friend, and your Saturday is good all round. Alice. 

[tyme]

Hello my dear @Alice10 ,

You deserve better. You deserve the best. I the way ahead becomes clear to you.

I can't tell you what to do, but whatever you chose, I will support you and sit with you 🙂

Hey there @Asgard !

[Alice10]

Hi @tyme 

Your words are very encouraging because I'm not a fast mover since experiencing mental health issues in my 30's. I'm in my 40's now, but the lasting impact has been a very big desire to not wanting to experience trauma again, even though I'm suffering in this relationship I don't want to leave. Having said that, I'm going to make a phone call today about a possibility for somewhere to move to. I've been putting it off. That's an understatement but that's OK. Thank you for your words. The lack of judgement from you and @Asgard has gently coaxed me into at least making an enquiry again about a possibility.

I must admit, I'm partly terrified. One step. That's all I can do. Cheers, Alice.

[Asgard]

Morning @Alice10  and long time no chat @tyme 

Well my Bunnings trip was a non event, Lisa gets really bad migraines so I told her to stay in bed and look after herself.  I have read your latest posts a fair number of times Alice and I think you already know what will eventuate, its only when you choose to do it.

But as @tyme said, we only ever what the best for you and will always be here for you when you want a chat.  Life is bloody hard, sometimes crappy situations seem more safe to us that new ones.  I guess its really whether we trust ourselves enough that we empower ourselves to make that change.  You do it at your own speed Alice.  Thinking of you as always...........Asgard

[tyme]

In reading your post @Alice10 , I hear the comfort of staying despite the challenges as opposed to the fear of the unknown. Is that fair to say?

I guess the main question to ask yourself is, are you okay to continue another 20 years or so with things as they are? If so, let it be. But if not, I guess that's where change needs to come. 

Only you know the answer. 

We are here to support you no matter what.

Thinking of you @Asgard @Alice10 

@Asgard , glad the Bunnings trip went well. Are you a regular Bunnings-er? I don't go much but I have a few things I need to return. Wonder what the root of the name, Bunnings, comes from... I guess I can google it lol.

Hope you have a pleasant week!

[Asgard]

Hi @tyme 

Have a bad addiction to Bunnings, spend hours there.  Apparently Bunnings bagan in Perth by 2 english guys, originally they were carpenthers.  Worked there for 3 months, the pay is really crappy and boy do you work hard. 

Hope all is well with you @tyme  -- have started my new job, I live very close to St Vincents so it only tales me 15mins to walk there. 

Take care ....Asgard

[Alice10]

Hey @Asgard and @tyme,

Well, it's been status quo for a few days. I've been sick with a bad flu for 2 weeks and now have had to have chest x ray. Get the results in the morning. Had a lot of fatigue with it, so when my energy's up I think I can conquer the world, but as I said, staus quo at present. I made the phone call about the apartment I knew of for rent but it's a no go.  Just thought I'd say hi, not much to report ATM. 

Alice

[Alice10]

Hi @Asgard 

I've found out I've got two partially collapsed lungs. Seeing doctor again Thursday. Never had a flu like this that I've had..

Alice

PS. Hope you're good and all going well 👍 

[Asgard]

Morning @Alice10 

Oh dear, thats not good at all, someone needs to be looking after you.  You just need to work on getting yourself healthy again, as my Mam used to say "Your health is your wealth".

So try and concentrate on yourself for the time being.

I just started a new job so am a tad knackered myself, its all good, just a lot of unknowns which is something i'm not that good with.  Plus have managed to greak my glasses so am half blind.

But enough of that, look after yourself Alice.............Asgard

[Alice10]

Hi thanks mate @Asgard 

I've talked to my mum again. She's talking to her partner about me staying while I sort myself out to move on... I've also made a couple of calls to friends, just reaching out to them to keep their ear to the ground. I'm trying to take steps that will help me. I'm slightly terrified but gathering some support again, as things have been very poor again. I'm going gently this time. Drama and fast events make me retract my decisions. I'm also praying a lot LOL. Cheers Alice