Am Not Coping

[MDT]

Take care @Zoe7 are you feeling safe and comfortable atm?

[Zoe7]

I don't feel very safe but I am trying very hard to be @MDT - I am really hoping for sleep soon and I will be on the couch tonight - that is the safest place for me when I feel like this 

You take care too - enjoy the rest of the game 

[Faith-and-Hope]

Yeah @Zoe7 ....

I can see S2’s light on from where I am, and that indicates that he is either gaming (to numb) or working,  

He was really badly treated by lecturers at his previous uni and it has left him emotionally scarred about getting assignments completed, so despite extensions it’s still really hard for him to engage and complete them, despite being as skilled in this field as he is ..... he has to get over this wall in the diploma before he can take on a degree again.  

The lecturers here are lovely.  He is battling fears that he knows are unfounded in this setting.  This is part of his healing, if he can get through.  I don’t know whether it will compound the issue if he doesn’t .....

It wasn’t the lecturers alone .... it was also what was happening at home, and the triggering of the genetic predisposition to the mi .... a perfect storm.

Have to just keep breathing deeply and holding him in the light.

This is the reason we have to give up Wolfie ..... for S2 and D3 to recover ......

[Zoe7]

Even though that is what needs to be done with Wolfie it is still yet another piece of your life you have to give up @Faith-and-Hope and that is incredibly tough despite why you have to 

I hope S2 can get through this period and begin to see the difference for him at this uni is that he can achieve what he wants with support - that is invaluable atm.

You are doing what you can for all your kids at that is all you can do Hon 

[Faith-and-Hope]

He is working @Zoe7 ..... he just called me in to view his progress ..... 👍

Relieved, and proud of him.  He is very talented.  It’s an artwork ..... an animation ..... and it’s very good, and inventive, intriguing ....

[Zoe7]

That is great news @Faith-and-Hope for both you and S2  It does seem he has your artistic abilities in spades then Hon 

[Faith-and-Hope]

Yes, I think if he can break through the wall this year he will recover progressively from there, and this is the most critical point.   

Yes, it is painful giving up those pieces @Zoe7 ..... but I need to think of them as exchanges ..... it’s a change of trajectory that will hopefully bring about the breakthroughs we need.  The signs are all here that it was the right thing to do ...... support systems and access to specialists are far more advanced here.

Did you manage to eat some carrots tonight ?

[Zoe7]

No carrots - will give my stomach a break until tomorrow - struggling enough emotionally tonight and can't have the physical pain as well @Faith-and-Hope I can deal with the pain much better during the day if it comes. 

There certainly seems much more happening for you all in the east than there was back west - that certainly makes the decision to move for the kids much easier to live with - you are definitely a very caring and giving mum and a wonderful friend too Hon 

[MDT]

All the best @Zoe7 and@Faith-and-Hope

[Zoe7]

To you too @MDT