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  • Author : LostAngel
  • support : 3
  • Topic : Our stories
2021-01-12T12:43:17+00:00
Senior Contributor

hi everyone Ive been on holiday for a few days now Smiley Happy seeeing family that I havent seen for such a long timeSmiley Happythe first day was tireing but good I managed to somehow get safely to where we needed to go  the first day or so was good,but then as things go something is always bound to happen it seems at just the wrong momment long story short there ended up being some family conflictSmiley Sadwhich I think mostly everyone else got over it but it took me alot of time than everyone else as it messed with my feelings and thoughts made me feel down,humilited,upset and very quiet,wanting to be alone cause I had trouble trying to process things of what had happend Smiley Sad I felt responsibile for the fact that my youngest brother whos a 13 year old teenager decided to make a bad choice which ment another family member got injured to the point of needing some first aid and this happend during a fun family activity of all times,theres was quite a few family close family friends who saw what happend as well as myself seeing what happend but anyway I just felt so bad,we where all having fun one minute and then that happend Smiley SadI heard and saw my older cousin who is almost 30 years old absolutely swearing and screaming at my youngest brother,which both shocked me and sort of shamed me so then my reaction was I went completely quiet and left the area where everyone else was mind you this happend in a family members backyard that we are staying with during this trip which didnt help matters either,so anyway I then yelled openly blaming myself and telling everyone it was my fault ,the injured family member left and went home,I went to my room and stayed away from everyone for a while,but not before giving my brother a stern talking to about my brothers actions but I felt responsible for his actions out of wanting to proctect my little brother,anyway I stayed quiet and away from everyone else,had a bit of a cry,started thinking a bit stupid like I felt like taking off in my car for a drive around the area by myself then I had 3 different family members one after another knocking on my door to check on me I just told them each a lie about being ok when I wasnt ok cause I didnt want anymore drama,but thats my thing that I usually do when things go bad I tend to want to just run or self loath over it,pretty much put my emotional walls up very quickly,eventually I got out my room and rejoined family for some dinner but then the family member that got injured came back around but didnt say anything to me and things got too aukward for me so I went back to my room again  

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