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  • Author : SJT63
  • support : 4
  • Topic : Our stories
2021-01-11T02:41:00+00:00
Senior Contributor

hello all and first, @Powderfinger  sorry I had you worried. Your chairs are AMAZING and I'm keen to hear more about your new friend with the tools.

 

As well as not going to the office I also took a fairly substantial "computer break" and I find replying on my phone nigh on impossible.

 

Christmas: I was able to convince everyone that with the border situation so volatile that we should just go and see his family for the day. Not staying with the sister lifted a whole layer of anxiety from all involved and the day was fine, if a little tiring. This year his eldest was able to share the driving with me so that made quite a difference.

 

My Birthday: For the first time since we've been together (this was my third birthday with him) he was out of bed and behaving like a person. The last two I've spent "nursing" him through the post-Christmas relapse. (I'm now 58 for those taking notes).

 

I think the last time we all spoke here I'd been advised by his new psychologist to think about responding to him as high functioning autistic rather than bipolar and WOW what a difference. It lends a completely new perspective to what I thought was coercive control.

 

for instance.... one day out of nowhere he blew up because I never change the toilet paper. I thought I did. A month ago I would have worried about what I had really done wrong to make him angry.. or did I forget just once and that was enough to make him want to punish me.....

 

......but wait.... we now apply the autism filter and I gave the situation serious thought for a couple of days. Does he feel like he is always changing the toilet roll because what I leave on the roll my brain registers as "enough for 2 or 3 more wees" and his brain sees as "not enough for a decent number 2 so why does she NEVER change the roll"?

 

I asked him. He had NEVER realised that a couple of dozen sheets left on the roll was usable. It had NEVER occured to him that I didn't need great handfulls of the stuff if I'd just had a pee and he thought I was leaving it there because I couldn't be bothered to change it. He was chucking away the last sheets that had been deemed "not enough". I hadn't noticed; the status of the toilet roll not being a high priority for me.

 

Now it's a non-issue. We both keep an eye and when it starts getting too low, one or the other of us put's what's left to one side for me to finish up while a new one is installed. 

 

Simple  but life-changing things. My physical symptoms are abating and I've made  himself 2 shirts, 3 teeshirts and me 2 dresses while I've been on hiatus.  And various sauces and chutneys which I gave away as gifts. 

 

My Cert IV in Celebrancy came through and now it takes about 3 months to register with the Attourney General's department.

 

Now. @Darcy @Shaz51 keen to hear about you and your misters and how you spent the festive season.. hopefully festively.

@Myboy ... self isolating? Test results? I do hope you are OK. 

 

much love to all

S

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