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Jamesb
New Contributor

In-law and partner & I buying houses next door to each other, what could possibly go wrong...

So me and my partner were looking at this home as home buyers, her mother is selling her home seen next door to the home we want to buy was for sale as well and she put a deposit on it.

My girlfriend thinks it will be good to live next door to her mother, but I beg to differ saying we will lose privacy and independence of seeing her everyday, her being next door, not able to do anything outside without being seen and asked what are you doing or having a chat, and most likely the uninvited coming over all the time, and probably helping her all the time as she is single and lonely.

 

I don't have any issues with her mother but being right next door I don't feel comfortable with and not having the freedom and independence of your own home to enjoy already annoys me, I can see this is going to be a train wreck waiting to happen as I disapprove of it already but my gf insists it will be fine 

 

What are your thoughts on having inlaw/s next door to you?

2 REPLIES 2

Re: In-law and partner & I buying houses next door to each other, what could possibly go wrong...

Hi @Jamesb, I'm not sure about in-laws, but I grew up with my grandparents right next door. They now live half an hourish away and still show up all the time, as they have for as long as I can remember and want to know nearly everything that's going on. I've come to learn that this is their way of showing they care, and that's what I remind myself of if it starts feeling frustrating.

 

For you. If this is a real concern, I wonder if it'd be worth talking to your partner about it and sharing your perspective and concerns? Perhaps there's a way you can put boundaries in place to help maintain your privacy to an extent. I hope you're able to find a solution that works for everyone. 

 

TideisTurning  

Re: In-law and partner & I buying houses next door to each other, what could possibly go wrong...

Hey @Jamesb, thanks for reaching out and posting Heart

 

I think everyone would be different - I personally relate in feeling I would want to have some more independence and privacy. What's important here though is that it sounds like you're really not comfortable with how this might turn out, even though your partner is.

 

Does your partner understand how serious your concerns are? If a deposit's already been paid I'm not sure to what extent the decision is reversible. If it's not, it might be helpful for everyone to communicate and identify some clear boundaries to ensure you'll have the level of independence and privacy you need while still living in close proximity.

 

All the best for navigating this 🌻

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