BPD / alcohol - help for carer/ parents

[Helena2]

BPD.  

Hi I’m looking for info on BPD 

My loved one does not have a diagnosis of this as such but it has been suggested as a possibility. She is alcoholic- using alcohol to deal with unregulated emotions 

[Former-Member]

Afternoon @Helena2 and welcome to the SANE Forums 😊

There are many threads within the SANE community addressing the topic of BPD which may be useful, but I thought one of the best ones to start with is the Topic Tuesday event here. It can also be handy to use the search function using the term "borderline personality disorder".

If you wanted to find out information about specific services to help support your loved one then you could also give the SANE help centre a call on 1800 187 263 (Mon-Fri 10am -10pm). It's a free and anonymous service for those living with complex mental health issues, as well as their family, friends and careers.

I'm also going to tag another of our Peer Support Workers who is very knowledgable when it comes to BPD and associated services @tyme. They may be able to make a few recommendations (though we all operate on varied shifts so there could be some delay).

If you ever need any help in the forums with tech based issues or support generally please feel free to tag a moderator like this @moderator.

And lastly, I will tag our wonderful group of Community Guides to welcome you to our forums as well:

@Anastasia  @AussieRecharger  @BPDSurvivor  @Faith-and-Hope  @HenryX  @jem80  @Judi9877  @NatureLover  @outlander  @Shaz51  @ShiningStar  @Snowie  @Hams  @wellwellwellnez  @Zoe7  @Aniela  @Boo13  @CrazyChick  @maddison  @pinklollipop15  @Eve7 

Rhye ☘️

[Helena2]

Thank you for your detailed reply Rhye
I’m having some difficulty posting but hopefully will get used to it eventually .
I’m trying calling the help line but they are busy

My main query for now is my loved one is in denial about BPD
any info pointers on how to get her to accept she has these problems
She doesn’t want to accept the “ tentative “ diagnosis from .
Reading a book on BPD I think she fits into the highly functioning category who is in denial
How can I get her to reconsider this diagnosis
She insists that she just has severe anxiety

[Bipolarcarer]

I am not sure you can, they have to accept they have a problem..

Are they seeing someone? if not can you encourage them to, if so would they let you attend a session with them to express your concerns (though I wouldn't mention BPD, just explain the things you are seeing you are concerned with)..

Really though, I think talking to the sane line is a great first step, reach out if you haven't already.

[tyme]

Hi @Helena2 ,

From experience, it's ok if one doesn't want to accept a 'label' or diagnosis. What's important is that they realise something is 'not quite right'. That is the starting point. 

The label merely helps with finding targeted therapies etc. If she doesn't want the diagnosis, rather, ask her what is not working in her life that she wants to see change in.

Hope that helps,

tyme