Lived Experience Forum

[Former-Member]

I am panicking about this week, i feel really physically week and shaky today, but i think its just that i'm letting myself get overwhelmed and I'm trying to break things down into manageable pieces. I have parent/tch interviews for three nights, a telemed appt with my psychiatrist to review my back to work stuff and meds, and then a trip to the capital city which will be a 14 hour round trip there and back (have to get home for the kids that night so have to do it in one day) for a family court ordered psychiatric review and I'm so scared about that. I'm terrified of what somone might say after meeting me for 1 hour and reviewing lots of writing/reports, court trial, and affadavits from my ex that are full of lies. the psychiatric review doesnt even include any documents from my current psychiatrist because that could bias his opinion. 

I'm not sure how to get through everything and it feels like it never ends. just goes on and on. I'm terrified of this report saying i have '....' something or other and what that might mean for family court considering if i am a 'good' mother, (my children are well looked after!!) and b what it'll mean for my job if iget an official diagnosis of some other thing. at the moment i am dx as major depression and ptsd. 

lj

[Chris]

Hi lisajane. You are sounding really stressed. Is it possible to take someone with you to share the driving and give you moral support. Please think about it. It could make alot of difference for you.. hope it all goes well.

[Appleblossom]

Most teachers without kids stress about parent teacher week. 

It is a very heavy load.  Is it possible to delay the court ordered psychiatric i/v to some time in the holidays?  That way you can compose yourself better and just get time for a breathe.

I know its court ordered and all that .. but I think you could make a case for rescheduling it.

[Former-Member]

Hi thankyou both @Chris and @Appleblossom

I'm so scared that im finding it hard toconcentrate. I feel like i cant breathe at all. I think i was already supposed to have done the psychiatric assessment before the family assessment (which i didnt know!) so ithink they need time to put it together with that before the court date. 

It all feels so completely hopeless. and i have noone to look after the kids for me on friday either and ifeel like im so totally alone.

lj

[Appleblossom]

It doesnt sound fair @Former-Member

I know the feeling of being alone. 

You are smart and know the mindfulness strategies, you might be able to hire someone. What about the refuge support people?

I wont distract you from the things you have to do.

Take care

Apple

[Angels333]

Oh @Former-Member , I hope someone can help with Friday for you xx

[Former-Member]

I need toleave at 5:30 in the morning which is the main problem i guess. i hate always having so many problems. things just seem impossible and too hard. 😞 

[Angels333]

How are you going? I was thinking about you and I hope you can do something nice for your self. Buy plenty of nice coffee and treat yourself really well xxxx

[Former-Member]

hi @Angels333

im so low, im just so overwhelmed i cant think how to go forward. its just not a fair world.

lj

[Angels333]

Oh I'm so sorry @Former-Member I only logged on now, I wish I had seen this earlier. When I am so low I just keep using the crisis lines, lifeline and suicide call back service, sometimes more than one call per night.

I hope it works out well for you xx