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Something’s not right

Serenity1
Senior Contributor

😥Think I'm seriously having a break down

I think im have a break down- I can't stop shaking, my hands are tingling & clenched in a weird way like I can't hold a pen or hold anything- my face is tingling, my legs feel weird, my whole body feels weird.

 I am hyperventilating, I have been on the help line all afternoon first guy was Really supportive & helpful- told me to ring back- second lady didn't want to hear what I had to say & kept interrupting me & hung up on me-

i feel I may have done something wrong- I don't know for sure but I feel like I have & I am really scared & worried-I am not going to hurt myself or anyone- just don't know how I'm going to get through this- I almost called an ambulance because I was feeling so weird- but didn't want my daughter taken away from me- I have a doctors appointment tomorrow at 11:30& I don't know how I'm going to get through the night to make it to my appointment- or how I'm going to get her to school tomorrow- please God help me-I wish I had one person who could give me a hug & tell me they will be there to help & support me no matter what happens- I am all alone except for my daughter who relies on me- what happens if I do breakdown completely- what happens to her then- I am not strong enough to deal with this situation 😥

32 REPLIES 32

Re: 😥Think I'm seriously having a break down

I'm sorry to hear that you are so unwell and trying to cope with what sounds like an acute episode while being a responsible parent and thinking about how you will be able to look after your daughter.  

Good to hear that you have been on the phone to counsellors today and that the first one was helpful, the second one not so much.  

I am not a counsellor so cannot offer you advice on what and how to care for yourself overnight.  However, I would like to offer the following thoughts to you:

 

- You are not alone in this world.  There are many people who care and feel empathy for you and your daughter, even though they are not right there with you now.  You will get through this; just keep telling yourself that you are strong enough and you will be strong enough. 

-  You have said that you were thinking about ringing the ambulance and get in and see a doctor earlier.   If you are continuing to feel so unwell this evening, ring the ambulance immediately.  You can take your daughter in with you.  By taking this action, ou are being responsible for yourself and you are being a good parent.

  

- You have reached out through his forum which is a good positive decision.  Think about who else you can reach out to for help this evening and in the days ahead.  Do a mind map on a piece of paper and write these organisations, groups and individuals down.  Then find out their details and contact them by telephone and email.

 

- I think you should ring the telephone counselling service again, as many times as you need to during the night.  That is what they are there to do, to listen and support people in crisis.  (When you're feeling recovered, I suggest making a complaint about the poor treatment you received from the second counsellor; obviously not tonight but in the days to follow.  You deserve more and better than that.)  But the important thing is not to let this one poor counsellor/call put you off from telephoning again, as many times as you feel the need to speak to someone.

 

- Decide right now that your daughter will not be going to school tomorrow because you are so unwell.  You need to attend the doctor's appointment in the morning.  Who can you ask to stay with your daughter?  If you don't have family close, what about asking a neighbour (who you trust) or ask your daughter's friends' mothers to help you.  Again you probably know more people than you think you do, even though they may not be close friends.  

 

Anyhow I am thinking of you this evening and wishing for your recovery.  I hope my thoughts are not too cliche - I know that it is not easy for you - but you are reaching out for help and it is right and sensible that you do ....and please keep doing so.  If you don't do it, you won't get the help you need now, and your daughter loves and needs you. 

 

Re: 😥Think I'm seriously having a break down

@Dani_Murray hi I only seen your post now 6:31 am- I kept checking to see if anyone had replied & it didn't show any thing- God I wish I had seen it last night I could have really used your words.
I don't know how I'm going to get through this day- I think I am going to have a break down- I think I am breaking down
Do you think I should not send my daughter to school because I was struggling with that choice- she saw me yesterday (& in previous weeks)- & I don't know if I should send her or not.
I don't have any one I can trust- but there is one person I can think of a grandmother of a child at school I think she would help me- the only problem is she is a gossip & I don't want her to tell anyone- but every time I see her she tells me all her family secrets including her daughter a mum at the school- so don't know if I am making situation worse for myself
I am not friends with any mums from the school- I have no one

Re: 😥Think I'm seriously having a break down

Hi @Serenity1. What you're going through sounds so hard 🙁 I agree with @Dani_Murray in that it sounds like you're really trying to be a responsible parent while you're managing this and it seems like you're doing a really good job of it. It's so tough to be thinking of our little people while feeling so muddled sometimes.

Is your appointment still at 11:30? That's not too many hours away and it is much fewer than it was when you posted last night. You got this far so keep trying to take it hour by hour (moment by moment if you have to) ❤

Do you think it would be helpful for you to have your daughter at school for your appointment or to be with you? I don't know about you, but I find it easier to have open conversations about my mental health and how things are going without my kids around. It's great you've identified someone who might be able to help you out, even if it isn't ideal.

Thinking of you.

Re: 😥Think I'm seriously having a break down

I don't know if I should send her to school or ask the person for help I can't move, function or think straight- I don't want her at appointment- just don't know if it would be easier on me to face the school crowd or the grandmother IV explained above?? @CheerBear

Re: 😥Think I'm seriously having a break down

Re: 😥Think I'm seriously having a break down

I know it's easier said than done, but if you can focus on only the things you need to do this morning and that you can control it might be easier for you @Serenity1. The school mums will think whatever they'll think and there's not much you can do to change that. Your job this morning sounds like it is to look after you and your daughter.

If you're struggling to move and function, asking for help sounds like a great idea. Can Grandmother come and pick your daughter up for school or could you take your daughter to her to be taken to school?

Re: 😥Think I'm seriously having a break down

Sorry @Serenity1 I think I misunderstood how the grandmother might be able to help you.

Whatever you can do this morning to make things easier for you might be the way to go. You can worry about what that might mean after you get through today.

Re: 😥Think I'm seriously having a break down

Will my daughter be taken away from me if I breakdown completely? @CheerBear @Dani_Murray

Re: 😥Think I'm seriously having a break down

Big hugs @Serenity1. That's an awfully scary thought and one that has scared me in the past.

What I've learnt is that it's super important to get the help you need for both you and your daughter. Recognising you need help, asking for support, and doing things like thinking about your daughter and how she might be looked after while you're struggling, are signs of someone who cares very much about their child. People will see that.

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