Lived Experience Forum

[rachel1993]

Hi there - apologies if I've posted in the wrong area.

Basically, I am blessed with a daughter. I had a traumatic birth ending in emergency c section four and a bit months ago and had complications following the birth with recovery and HUGE complications breastfeeding. My daughter is thriving now though thank goodness.

Things aren't getting better. And a referral has been made for me to stay in a mother and baby unit. My concerns are:

Christmas coming up

Judgement from others - not wanting extended family etc to know

Fear of the unknown

Missing my fiance

My daughter missing my fiance

Having to travel 8+ hours alone with my daughter in order to attend

I have no idea what I should take and what I shouldn't... I don't want to seem ridiculous when I get there but don't want to feel under-prepared!

In the process of buying a house - I want to experience this and live in it - not go away!!!

Whether Im being over the top going... 

Not knowing when a bed will come up and how that will effect our lifestyle

CHange in routine and environment for my baby

I will obviously find more information as my referral progresses. And plan to call PANDA tomorrow. But just wondering if anyone else can tell me of their experience in a mother baby unit? I wasn't sure if I was allowed to name the unit as I've read that you aren't able to name GPs specifically... But if I'm allowed, I will name it to see if others have been there specifically.

Thanks for reading. x

[eth]

Hi @rachel1993  I was in a mother and baby unit in Sydney a long time ago and felt a lot of what you describe feeling before we went in.  Overall it was an enormously helpful experience and I'm sure my child and I both had much better outcomes as a result of doing it.  We had two stays, 2 weeks and then 1 week about a month later.  They really helped with establishing better routines that worked for BOTH of us, getting my child to gain weight steadily and feed much more readily and sleep at regular times, and particularly helped me be more confident and struggle less. They have counsellors you should be able to discuss the other issues with, possibly by phone in advance.

If you contact them they will tell you what you need to bring with you.  Hoping this helps you.  You and your baby are the number one priority now 🙂

[-karma-]

Welcome @rachel1993

@PANDA is actually one of the forum moderators, and will also respond to your post!

I agree with @eth that a phone call to the unit would cross some concerns off your list.

Is there any possibility for your finance to also stay with the both of you, or maybe close by?

It sounds like your worries are gaining momentum, and the fact that there aren't necessarily clear answers to some of these concerns, makes it all the more difficult.

You've started the journey on the back foot with a delayed recovery, it can't have been easy.

Although there are things for you to consider before committing to a stay in the unit, I'm sure the benefits and moving forward will outweigh the disruption.

Best wishes

[Former-Member]

Congratulations on the birth of your daughter! I'm sorry that your birth was traumatic and there were complications. My second child was a difficult birth for me emotionally and was very frightening at the point of birth because he was in distress.
Breastfeeding my first was really hard, I spent quite a bit of time visiting the lactation nurse feeling like a failing cow - but we got there in the end. The Aus breastfeeding association have a phone line as well and I used that a few times with my second (he was so different in how he fed!!!)

I also struggled with settling my daughter and it was only after someone from my mothers group travelled to Adelaide to go to a mum Bub unit - then came home and shared what she learnt with a few of us who were struggling that I was able to develop a solid sleeping routine for her at night. I know that my friend felt really nervous about going but she came home so much more confident and had actually gotten some rest herself which also helped her so much in all things!!

I think getting help takes way more courage than suffering in silence - it really will help you all as a family. Write down all your questions so you don't forget then when you get the phone call. I always forget everything as soon as someone says "do you have any questions?"

Good luck,

Lj

[Appleblossom]

I spent a week in one when my son was 6 months ... it helped a lot ...

your situation is unique ... take on board only as much as you can manage ... if you forget to pack something they will probably be able to help out anyway ... just take one step at a time.