Lived Experience Forum

[Juzz]

Hello there, im new to this and the whole forum thing but a bit of back ground I guess when I was 16 I got told I had BPD I went through treatment therapy what ever you call it and got many amazing coping mechanisms.

I'm now 25 and have found life getting away from me again my self harm has been increasingly frequent my ability to cope with stress is pretty much non existent, I still remain very good and putting on a front to avoid questions but as soon as im alone I feel incredibly alone.

Anyway im from New Zealand and I arrived here in February I have a full time job a lease on a house ect ect. And today I went to the doctor and asked for help I pretty much hit Barriers every where as I don't have a Medicare card, and I got shunted out of the office without many questions asked and told to come back when I have a card. Well that just made me feel so good about myself.. 😕 I had a big break down im lucky enough to have a very supportive mother and she helped talk me into a calm state but was unable to help with how I go about getting a Medicare card.

Im pretty sure I can figure it out but another thing I need help with is if anyone knows a doctor that has an understanding of mental health that I could go see I want to get refered to a psychologist so I can start building up my strength an coping systems but the one I went to today made me feel like I was tiner than an ant and that feeling is hard to bear.

Well I don't know how this works I don't even know if this is what a forum is for but im reaching out to the community for help and any advice is appreciated x

[CherryBomb]

Hi @Juzz

Thanks for taking a brave leap and sharing your first post - it can be quite daunting. 

You are in the right place in terms of finding a community. You are not only in your experiences, and there are a few members on here with BPD who share similar concerns to yourself. @Billamba started this thread about managing emotions. @Crazy_Bug_Lady also has BPD and she has started this coping box to manage SH urges. Also @Anon1981 and @Cherpieus have spoken about DBT here. 

I think it's great that you reached out to a doctor. They are usually a good first point of call. But it's a pity they couldn't help because of this medicare card stuff. My partner is also from NZ. He went into a Medicare outlet and applied for card, and they provided him one with temporary one. I think they gave him a number so that he could see a doctor while he was waiting for his card to get sent out to him. 

Also, you probably have not come across the community guidelines yet. In it, we ask that members not give out details of doctors as it could be seen as serving someone's commerical interests and there are defamation concerns too. It's not biggie. We understand that the guidelines are quite difficult to find so it's understandable if you have not come across them. 

But you can search for MH services and doctors on Mindconnect.

I wonder if any of the members on here can offern any tips or resources, such as Mindconnect, to find doc in the community?

Again, welcome to the community! I hope to see more of you on here. 

CB

[Juzz]

Thanks 🙂 super new to all this so I really appreciate the information I've been reading through the forums and there is plenty of great advice and now I've calmed down I've realised getting a Medicare card isn't as daughnting as I thought it might be. Thanks again and I'll have a look through mind connect

[CherryBomb]

That's awesome @Juzz. Feel free to drop into to other threads and share your experiences. There's a great bunch here...

[Billamba]

Hi @Juzz

I am hearing what you are saying with your ability to cope being almost non-existent but having a good front to put on to others. It's very difficult isn't it. Sometimes I wish I didn't have such a front and then I would feel more able to let others in and thus feel less alone. 

Im glad obtaining a Medicare card seems easier now. That's good news 🙂 I do find it sad though that you were turned away from the doctor at a time you obviously need one. I understand that you need a Medicare card but to just be sent on your way I don't believe is the answer either. 

Good luck findings doctor. I am moving home shortly (new state) and will need to find a new GP, psychologist etc which is pretty daunting for me. Thankfully the current mental health nurse I work with has said she will keep in phone contact with me and assist me in this process remotely so I'm glad about that. I guess other than mine connect you could just generally ask people you know I'm your area if they know of a good doctor, whether you bring mental health up is your personal choice of course. I'm not sure I would be brave enough! 

I hope to talk to you some more soon. Good luck obtaining your Medicare card and starting the process of finding a GP, psychologist etc x

[Juzz]

It's amazing how refreshing it is to hear someone else has the same hardships with letting down there front. It's amazing that your nurse will be there to assist with your move as emotions can be all up in the air when dealing with the stresses of moving but I'm sure you'll handle it with the support of nurse that's really willing to go the extra mile for you. It's sometimes the little gestures that can really warm our hearts :).

Totally not brave enough to bring up my mental health when I'm just starting to make new friends, I don't want to scare them away with a very intense conversation (who knew making friends as an adult would be so complicated lol) but I think it's a good idea to just ask the general hey what a good GP in our area conversation.

Thanks for your message and I hope the move goes smoothly for you 🙂

[Billamba]

I really am very lucky and to know she will go that extra mile is helping bring my stress level down a little. One less thing I have to worry about immediately. You really are correct, it can be very heartwarming that's for sure. 

Your paragraph on bringing up mental health while starting to make new friends is like I have written it myself. I can totally relate! I very much agree with your comment about making friends as an adult being so complicated, goodness who knew! Making friends is hard enough without adding in the complication of mental health. But that will only lead to me a great big rambling post about the stigma around mental health and people's reactions to people in their lives having mental health. Anyway! 

Thanks for the well wishes in regards to moving. A few weeks still to go, just trying to stay in the moment and not get too head of myself. 

[Mazarita]

Sorry you had that experience with the doctor, @Juzz. I've had a few hairy encounters with new GPs too. But most doctors I've gone to, even without recommendations, have been good.

When out of other leads, I have sometimes used Google searches to find local doctor, psychologist, psychiatrist. Some practitioners have their own websites or there might be biographies of them on clinic websites. 

Once you get the Medicare card, you may be eligible for the psychologist referral under a 'Mental Health Care Plan'. But you may already know about that.

In the meantime, you might be interested in a couple of online resources. They are both connected to universities and are CBT-based:

MoodGym

MindSpot

I did the MoodGym program over about 6 weeks earlier this year for the anxiety and depression symptoms of bipolar. It gave me some real help. I haven't used MindSpot but have seen it mentioned elsewhere on the forum. I think there may be some phone contact or counselling in the Mindspot program, which may be beneficial to you too.

Wishing you well.