Lived Experience Forum

[elski]

Hello everyone,

I was wondering if you could help me. The other night I this I experienced a drug induced psychosis. It was brought on by smoking weed. It was the second time I ever smoked in my life and it happened the first time I smoked which was over 10 years ago so very stupidly I thought I would again.
I went into a deep paranoid state and was extremely scared that I was dying. I kept hearing the same things being repeated and was talking about stages and negative states with my friend who was trying to calm me. The really intense part of the episode lasted about 4 hours and then I was able to come to a bit and accept I was ok. It has continued a little bit though now and I am still afraid I am in some kind of state where I've actually been taken to hospital but I'm in a coma and this is just some kind of fantasy I am living. I've spoken to my friends and they have been super supportive but I still 100% don't feel really right and I just needed some help. I don't have a history or family history of schizophrenia, the only time this happened before it lasted a lot less than this and I was a lot less sketchy and paranoid. I keep rolling from feeling fine like YEP I am home safe etc etc to Nope I am actually in hospital and this is me just in some kind of dream going about doing my daily life. Like any weird beeps and stuff I associate with the hospital noises coming into my sleep and I think maybe when I am spending time with my friends as I have today they might just be visiting me? But then I know that is completely rediculous and apart of the delusions, my body is tingling a lot and I am experiencing pain sometimes in my wrists and joints.

Obviously I will never ever in my life ever touch weed again and I have made an appointment to see a doctor on Monday.

I am wondering if this will continue or if it's likely to pass and if i am likely now to suffer from a psychotic disorder or was it likely just the weed?

Thanks for your help.

[kato]

Hi @elski 

Welcome to the forums.

I too have suffered drug induced psychosis, i also suffer from a type of Bipolar also, and perhaps other stuff as well, still working on getting full and proper diagnosis.

For me i don't know how many times i have suffered from it, i know of at least 6 times, some have been quite severe and lasted quite a long time and others have been similar to yours.

I am glad you are having an appointment with your G.P they will ask you quite a few questions and you need to tell them the exact truth of everything, it is not easy, they will then help you work through what is going on, they may also recommend a psychologist as well, so don't be alarmed by that it is perfectly normal.

I think you have good courage to be able to speak about what has happened,

With everything i have heard from my specialists, it will pass and it differs from person to person, i have had so many because of my bipolar i didn't realise what i was doing exactly..... it may for you hang around for a little while, i am not sure as only your G.P will be able to help you identify aznd treat what has happened.

I wish you well for your appointment on monday.

feel free to ask questions here i know a lot of the members are very supportive.

[kristin]

Hey @elski 

Welcome to the forums , thanks for sharing so courageously and honestly - your experience sounds quite terrifying. I can well understand why it would scare the crap out of you.

I'm afraid unlike Kato I can't offer any insights into your experience because by grace I have never had such an experience. I wonder if any others like @Rick  or  @kenny66  have any insights or suggestions?

I do know that MJ can have a very bad effect on some people. I have a good friend from high school who ended up with schizophrenia as a result of smoking it in his teens. We're now in our 50's but it has been a terribly hard road for him. So it sounds wise on your part to steer completely clear of it from now on (even if no schizophernia history) just to be safe.

I'm really glad you've been getting support from good friends (worth their weight in gold), and also going to the GP Monday. Your experience sounds quite surreal. I wonder do you think you will remember it clearly after it has passed? It might be worth writing what you notice/remember if you can bear it. This may be helpful for both the GP and whoever he/she refers you to for assessment/help.

Maybe also having a trusted friend around whilst you fully recover, if that is possible. Sounds like they are helping to anchor you through this. This should pass (I won't say will because I'm no expert but kato seems confident), in the meantime as Rick reminds us.... hope endures.

Please take care, and if you feel you need to go to hospital then do so.

Kindest regards,

Kristin

[Rick]

@elski 

Hi Elski and welcome. This is a good place to come for experiential knowledge. It's also good that you see your Doc and maybe look at referral to a Psyche at least for assessment and evaluation.

That being said, in my work as a youth worker a few years ago I saw many cases of "weed induced psychosis".

It is a fairly common occurence in recent years due to the nature of the type of weed that is sold. The actual THC content in what is currently available is much higher than in old school types or bush grown types. The THC itself is also of a differnet chemical makeup. It is a much more psychtropic type that has been isolatied through genetic enhancement and reacts to different receptors of the brain.

In most cases where use is isolated to very sparse usage recovery is often 100%. There may need to be some need for a remedial antipsychotic but this is simply to correct a temporary inbalance. 

If I was to give advice I would say that seeing your doctor and maybe a psychiatist would be a wise precaution. And of course you might do well to avoid weed in the future.

Well done to you for managing your psychotic break in such a constructive way. And reaching out though sometimes challenging is also very wise. Obviously you have an excellent self knowledge and know when things just aren't right. Don't feel bad about this, it is an issue that is affecting people more often than in the past but it is not commonly known. 

I hope you recover well and don't be afraaid to access the forum no matter what happens. We support each other here and in my opinion the folk here do that extremely well

take care

Rick

[elski]

Hi everyone,

Thank you all for your extremely caring and supportive responses.

I have fully recovered today and it seems all the negative thoughts have passed and I am fully aware I am not trapped in some bazaar Dream state anymore.

i have a really good recollection of the freaked out thoughts I was having and how long it lasted and the stages it went through. The initial beginning was exactly the same as the original time it happened and then I think because we had been drinking for a lot longer and I am older now and likely smoked more in this instance than the first time (when I was 17) the reaction was much worse.

I am going to write my experience down. It was extremely frightening and really polarizing for me and I am going to fully focus myself on getting better now and ofcourse never touching MJ Again.
I will discuss the incident with a medical professional still as I would like to still gain some more insight into how it all happened.

Rick, thank you for your kind words and knowledge on the way the THC is different these days.
Kato, thank you for your initial repsonse and guidance, and
Kristen, thank you for asking others to help me and offering your support and guidance also.

I will update with progress.


ELS. Xo

[kristin]

Hey @elski 

I'm so pleased that you are feeling ok today. That's such good news. Thanks for letting us know.

I guess my other thought about writing it all down is so you can read it if you are ever tempeted to use mj again. Your decision to talk to your doctor about it anyway sounds wise.

This begs the question though - what's happened to you that you felt the need to self-medicate with mj as well as alcohol (now and at 17)? BTW I'm not asking this in a judgemental way, I just wonder if you are needing some extra support with your mental health anyway. Sometimes it is the case when people use socially accepted readily available "medication" to self-med. If you don't want to talk about it, or you can't think of anything, that's fair enough.

Please take care, hope does endure...

Kindest regards, Kristin

[kato]

hey els,

really glad that, you are feeling much better today, and are still willing to see your dr,

it can be quite scary and confusing when it happens, and you by the sounds have some really good support from your friends.

hopefully all is good for you

[Rick]

@elski 

Hi El

So glad you are feeling better. The fact you remember everything clearly is a good sign.

Good luck and take good care of yourself

Hope endures

Rick

[elski]

Hi Kristen,

Totally fair question and I fully know it's not judgy. When I was 17 I think it was just peer pressure stupidity. Everyone was having a smoke and I said heck I'll try!
Kinda like innocent fun! thankfully again I was in a really good environment with good friends who supported me through the freak out back then too.
This time was different I am 28 now and was pretty down and out about being rejected again by a guy I started to like and went a bit wild for New Years. I've dappled in a bit of drug taking before maybe half a dozen times I have taken some
Cocain or ecstasy and it's only ever had super positive effects but I am really not into it. I've always socially drunk and its never ever been a problem and I know that I like drinking every now and than but it's never been a necessity or big part of my life. This time I thought maybe it would be different to the first time I tried it and I could handle the weed cos I was in a happy mood and had tried other drugs after the 17year old first timer experience and hadn't had any negative effects so one of my friends was smoking and I though heck whatever I'll give it a shot. Yeah BIG mistake. It's obviously something in the weed that my body cannot handle. I've never had any negative experience with other substances.

The experience felt very close to death for me. I kept feel like I was falling back into this darkness and I was going through stages of my life like some kind of movie but it was all related to death. I was talking to people like telling them I was ok and not in pain but that I was sorry I did this and that they would be ok. Like saying goodbye to them. As absurd as it sounds feel like I was on the brink and I kept just thinking about my mum and my sister and how much I didn't want them to die and that I wanted to see them again and at one stage I "spoke" to my mum
on the phone. (This didn't happen). I kept thinking I was in hospital and that I was imagining the faces of my friends onto the nurses. In actual fact my friends just kept me awake and alert and didn't let me roll out of consciousness.

I have suffered from a low self esteem for a long time as I have often fallen into negative relationships with guys who I can't really form very good friendships with and don't find people who really treat me with much respect. I find it hard to trust and stuff and just keep meeting people who walk all over me and don't really ever respect me or want me in their lives like a proper girlfriend. I've always just felt really low about this and I think that's likely what triggered my utter stupidity.

I think now being so close to what I felt like was death and being so upset at the two things I love the most (mum and sis) not being in my life that a partner doesn't really matter and hopefully I can get some self worth back being so frightened I was losing my life.

I have a very bad relationship with my father (his choice) and I think this is ultimately what I need to talk with about with a psychologist so I can evaluate my anxiety and emotions in situations better.

The experience was so intense and so profound and surreal in a way that I kinda don't want to forget as it was completely f* up I don't even know if I have the words to explain the sense of death I was having it was weird. That's kinda why I want to write it down as I know there is just absolutely no way I would ever be tempted to do it again. It's done now. I'm not taking any drugs or anything ever again.
I am also taking a break from alcohol for a while to just heal my body and get back to norm again.

I will follow through with the psych appointment this time as I did go and try and initiate seeing one about a year ago after a really nasty break up but just kinda let it drift by. It's the best thing this time though.

Thank you for letting me talk here though. It helps too.

Els. x 😁

[kato]

sounds like you are taking some really positive steps els,

i am 32 have dabbled consistently with lots of different drugs over the past near 20 years, and i am only just realising, the negative effects for me,

It is quite a confronting thing, to have that expierence, i know i have had similar ones, but didn't connect the dots,

you have a lot of strength and you sound very commited to seeking help/guidance and assistance

it was also quite honest what you posted which can be tricky.

thank you for sharing