Lived Experience Forum

[petrichor]

Hi 🙂 😕 😞

I have a question that worries me sometimes, a lot, probably more now than before and I would like to know if others feel this way and how they deal with it.

Like many of us I have a complex history with csa, mental illness, trauma from war, lately bushfires & covid, suicide attempts, gender identity issues… I have a support team but sometimes I need to reach out for extra support and I find it, let’s say challenging. When I’m unwell I often don’t know what mounted up to get me to that point and I don’t know who to reach out to. Sane is often not available due to office hours or business and I feel they can help me best. Beyondblue feels like a referral system and they have turned me back a few times. For some reason, without evidence, I feel lifeline will call an ambulance when I’m confused even if I am safe. QLine I have not found helpful. SCBS are always helpful but I only contact them when things feel really bad in my head, with them I feel that they would be able to judge if I need intervention.

Anyway, I’m really grateful we have access to additional support in our lives. Sometimes I just don’t know who to contact and at the moment that bothers me a lot as I have moved away and am far from my safe places, people, activities, pretty much my whole prevention plan and I don’t think I have thought this all through and have a few question marks in my head. 

i am safe, it just bothers me and I’m worried that I won’t know what to do. I’ve spent years to build my support system and know who and where I am safe to reach out to locally and everything is changing all the time now and I don’t know where my safety blanket is.

[greenpea]

 Hello and welcome@petrichor 😀. I have found sane forums suits my needs the best. Sure there are times that I disagree with the moderators on posting but all in all the formites are a extremely welcoming and caring bunch plus there are a lot of activities held which are extremely helpful. greenpea

[NatureLover]

Hi @petrichor ,

Do you mean you have moved house and are too far away from your previous support network? 

I'm sorry you are struggling with so much, and feel that you don't have enough support. 

[Molly22]

@petrichor  I'm sorry you are struggling.  I can definitely relate to that.

I don't have any advice for you.  But I want you to know you are not alone in how you are feeling.  A few years ago I moved interstate away from my children and friends and everyone and everything I knew.  Immediately after I moved, my husband of 17 years at the time, decided to stay and have an affair with a woman literally half his age.  So there was I stuck in a strange place, knowing no one, and feeling like my entire world was over.  I won't bore you with all the gory details, but we did reconcile eventually.  But it is something I will NEVER get over.  So now I live half a country away from my family.  I don't really have friends (have a very hard trusting people anymore).  I'm pretty alone in the world.

I have had similar experiences with support networks.  I struggle to use the phone due to being autistic, so I am kinda limited to 'chat' functions on websites and these are usually only available at limited times.  Plus I never really know what to say to these services.  I may not necessarily be suicidal, but I am just at the end of what I can handle and just need a lifeline.  Usually I just suck it up and cope somehow.  It's not great but I often feel like I have no other choice.

Finding this forum has at least given me another choice.  I don't feel quite so alone.  And whilst I can't reach out as often as I feel like I need to (also have 'being a burden' issues).  At least I know there will be someone there to listen if need be.

I do agree that the formal support services in this country and woefully inadequate.  Not sure if that is a problem that will ever really get solved. 

[petrichor]

Hi @NatureLover 

I left my home but haven’t got anywhere to stay and don’t really know where I’ll be, just that I’m already far from where I was. 

[NatureLover]

OMG @petrichor , you're homeless?

I am so sorry to hear!

[petrichor]

@NatureLover 

I haven’t really got used to that word 😕

[Former-Member]

@petrichor it sounds like you're stuck between a rock and a hard place. I hope these forums will make you feel less alone and more hopeful. I must say, what people are saying about some counselling services is correct. I won't disclose too much, but I find SANE counselling the least judgmental. They're the most understanding. They aren't trying to use the ambulance and police to manipulate or bully me, SANE is genuinely helpful and the view is, like all of us on the forums, that police and ambulance are there to keep everybody safe and help people into safe environments when they need assistance. And when it comes to challenges, I'm sure most of the time, emergency services know which places people need to go to. I'm sure all service providers can make mistakes, but if we're standing up for others and not creating further trouble when helping people as far as we know how, then at least most of us most of the time, are going to get whatever support we need. I find SANE counselling the best for support services.
I think SANE refers people to other crisis services because they know these crisis services are a 24/7 helpline once the SANE helpline closes at 10:00 pm and maybe some people benefit from these crisis support services. In saying that, I hope you'll find us good and safe company! Hopefully your current housing situation will get better too.

[Rhye]

Oh @petrichor, my heart is with you here 💜

I just want to check in to see that you're safe in your surroundings? I also wanted to check in with you to see whether you've been able to access any local support?

If things get rough please remember you can always reach out to the SANE counselling service on 1800 187 263, but as you so rightly pointed out, that line is in operation between the hours of 10am-10pm Mon-Fri and unfortunately sometimes life isn't neatly packaged between those times, hence why it's really important to link in with a local service provider to ensure that you keep yourself as well as possible during what sounds to be a particularly tough time for you.

If there is anything we can do for you here today i.e. help with accessing local supports etc, please let me know and we can arrange to send you an email.

With you @petrichor 💚

[Owen45]

I would love to be part of a support system, but unfortunately impossible to find.  Just got to live out my life alone and isolated.