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red1
Casual Contributor

what to do next?

Hi everyone,

It's been a while since i last posted.  things have gotten worse with fmaily and relatives.  As much as bpd is what it is, I thought that my family would have come around to how I am when I have my bad days.  They haven't and I don't feel the greatest.  this week in particular has been especially bad and today well let's just say well, I hated myself that much that I wanted to do something that bad.

Let's just say that family and relatives have said things that are not right, and they blame me for having a mental illness and i am the reason why they have a go at me and to get over everything that I feel and to stop making myself sick wit anxiety and anything else i get sick over.  They don't see themselves as contributing to what is going on, it's all my fault and i am constantly told that I am nothing and worthless, to the point where I have been excluded in relation to what has happened with mum due to being dagnosed with dementia.  I don't know what to do.  i want to stop all communication with family.  I am prepared to deal with the consequences of being on my own.  I'm sick and tired of being verbally and emtionally abused.

2 REPLIES 2

Re: what to do next?

Hey there @red1 thanks for your post, I am so sorry to hear of what you're up against with some of the people in your life. Nobody should tolerate verbal or emotional abuse, I just want to take a moment to say huge props to you on identifying you've had enough of this behaviour.

 

Sometimes with the developmental symptoms the wider community doesn't understand, and usually the people who have contributed the most to our complex mental health; refuse to acknowledge its existence - I know I have heard this narrative a lot across the community. You're at home here and we're always here to listen Heart It's not easy to estrange yourself from family, but with time and work we can all create new family - people who understand and collaborate with us, not judge us. How are you feeling about everything now? Heart

Re: what to do next?

Hi @red1 

 

I'm sorry your family is so unreasonable - it's not your fault that you have been and all the bad behaviour and unkind comments of your family won't make that so - you have a complex and hard to manage Mental Illness and although I haven't had this myself I have read a great deal here and there is a theme of misunderstanding and this is not fair at all

 

My son most likely had this disorder and my family rejected us - didn't want to hear - didn't want to know 

 

So - I left the family - I was told by my sister that I did strange things they didn't understand and they drove me away but I remember thinking at the time that I didn't need their bad behaviour and unkind comments and their rudeness frankly and I left - I could make my complex and unpopular decisions without their imput and without them I was better off though it's a hard choice to make and harder to live with

 

As @nashy  has says you can make a new family of people you understand of if they don't will still treat you with respect - you will find that here and I would like to welcome you to the forum family here where you will be accepted - you already are accepted - so I am glad you have found us

 

I wish you the best - time does pass and things do change - in time I was asked back into the family by my father who was sincerely sorry for what had taken place - my mother never did get it though and I never had a satisfactory relationship with her - so time can heal

 

Best - it can heal you - and I hope this is the case as quickly as it can - though it will take time

 

Dec

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