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beans
Contributor

sharing experiences with schizophrenia

Hello everyone,

 

I'm new here, hopefully I'm posting in the right forum 🙂 Thank you for having me.

 

I have a brother (38 y/o) that is battling some mental health issues and I wanted to touch base with someone who has schizophrenia or perhaps similiar conditions. I would like to get your perspective on how you think we can support him. Unfortunately he is not receptive to seeking help, therefore he does not have a diagnosis.

 

I'm not a medical professional, however I feel like his symptoms point to schizophrenia. I think that a combination of genetics, heavy cannabis use and some instense life changes in a small amount of time has contributed to his decline. At the moment, I don't feel he is at risk to himself or others so involunatary treatment is not an option for us. We also want to support him before it gets to that point. If he's not willing to seek help, I was wondering if perhaps you had some advice on how we could encourage him to do so? Do you have any suggestions on what to do or perhaps what NOT to do? At the moment family is the enemy for him and everything we say/do isn't helping him.

 

Thank you for your time ❤️

14 REPLIES 14

Re: sharing experiences with schizophrenia

Hi @beans, and welcome to the forums.

My schizophrenia diagnosis happened when the police picked me up off the street. I was hanging around the cop's small town and he couldn't fit me into any other category, so he took me to the nearest psych hospital which was in a large country town not far away. It was one of the best days of my life and really turned me around - I finally got a sense of where I fit in society.

I expect that a pre-diagnosis schizophrenic won't take very kindly to being labeled as such so manouvering one into the hospital system won't be easy. But sooner or later their behaviour will betray them and the cops will intervene and take decisive action.

It was a very humbling thing for me to accept my diagnosis, but I recognised an affinity at this hospital which I hadn't seen since early in my childhood, so I let go of my fears and inhibitions and accepted it.

Later, and quite possibly much later, after your brother surrenders to the inevitable, then the family can offer support which may then be welcomed. But in the mean time the life of a schizophrenic can be a solitary one. Psychosis is often the corollary of a solitary disposition. I know it was in my case.

Re: sharing experiences with schizophrenia

Hi @SkyView7 

 

Thank you so much for your insight, I really appreciate it. How old were you when you were diagnosed? Prior to your diagnosis, how did you feel when family/friends tried to reach out?

 

Yes, exactly- the pre-diagnosis is difficult to navigate. My fear is that it will take someone like the cops to intervene before we can get any traction on it.

 

How is life for you now? How do you manage your condition?

 

Re: sharing experiences with schizophrenia

@beans  Hi beans in all honesty there is nothing you can do until either he wants help or when it all falls apart and then is a danger to himself or others. If you could encourage him to see the family's trusted gp that would be a start.I have schizoaffective disorder and my son has schizophrenia plus other problems and the police were called in when we were admitted involuntarily on several occasions. It just seems to be the way it goes unfortunately.

Re: sharing experiences with schizophrenia

Hi @beans,

I was 27 when I was first admitted which is pretty old but not unusual.

It's a very sad thing but I rejected my family's sincere efforts to help me. I have many sad memories of their desperate attempts to get a hold of me and my behaviour.

From memory police intervention is one of few ways to get into the public system. I once tried to admit myself to a public psych hospital and was turned away.

I'm in my sixties now. I've been blessed with a life peaceful enough to allow some careful introspection. It seems that with time there is the chance of enlightenment.

I'm as alone as I've always been but I'm much more responsible. I really care about my family now which I haven't always done. I followed a dream in my youth and I sacrificed my family's feelings to make my dream come true. Fortunately they still love me and I've been able to redeem myself. 😊

Re: sharing experiences with schizophrenia

hi @beans my brother has a psychotic illness (as do I) and he was very unwell for weeks and weeks recently. I kept encouraging him to see a psychiatrist & go on medication but he ignored all my suggestions and continued to become more unwell. He finally had a psychosis and took himself to emergency and was admitted involuntarily. He then responded well to medication and went home. He never initiates contact with me and doesn't take much responsibility for his mental health (e.g. complains about side effects of his meds but when I suggest he tell his psychiatrist that & ask for a change to his meds, he ignores all my suggestions & doesn't take action). In our relationship, he only responds if I contact him, it's quite exhausting supporting him. I've given him a lot of tough love since his psychosis but he refuses to take action to improve his quality of life or prevent another psychosis. It's very frustrating.

 

Have you tried posting a thread on the Carer's Forum? There might be some family members of people who have schizophrenia there who can help you out.

Re: sharing experiences with schizophrenia

Hi @greenpea. From what I have found so far, it does appear that way- which is very unfortunate. How were your experiences with involuntary admission? 

Re: sharing experiences with schizophrenia

Hi @SkyView7 

 

Thank you for sharing your story. It's comforting to know that with time (and treatment), it is possible to live a peaceful life. Are you on medication? Are you able to recognise signs now and intervene?

 

Also, I'm very glad to hear your family are in your life. It's been a tough couple of years this way, and it's not until recent weeks when we've really put the pieces together to recognise that his behaviour is not him, it's an illness. Coming to this realisation means a change in approach for us.

Re: sharing experiences with schizophrenia

To be honest @beans I would be in a very dark place without medication. Every now and then I try a few days without it just to remind myself of what it was like before, and I'm staggered that I could have lived that way.

Back in the 80s when I was diagnosed I wasn't happy with the medication and I refused to take it, but the science has come a long way since then and I'm impressed with what it can do now.

The medication means I don't have to look for signs and take counter measures. I can live a free and productive life.

To be honest beans, I would be considering waiting for the right moment and calling the police for your brother. My brother called the cops on me once which hurt my feelings a bit, but off I went to hospital. My parents had an AVO on me at one stage which was embarrassing, but they had little sympathy for me by that stage. Perhaps your worst fear would be best for him.

Re: sharing experiences with schizophrenia

Hi @BryanaCamp 

 

Thanks for your sharing your experience with me. I can see a familiar pattern of not taking responsibility for his mental health. We too are exhausted in supporting him (emotionally, physically and financially). It's been a difficult couple of years, and it's not until recently when we've come to the realisation that his behaviour is related to some kind of mental illness. We will change our approach now to try and navigate that a bit.

 

Hopefully with time he starts to take some accountability. If not, I fear for him and his young children. Just want them all to have a quality of life. 

 

Yes, I have been browsing the carer's forum which has been helpful. Thought I would reach out in this forum to people who have a similiar diagnosis to try and get some understanding. I've really got a lot of out both forums, this site is very useful.

 

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