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Evie1
Senior Contributor

Self harm urges

I'm having self harm urges I'm not going to do anything just want someone to tell me how to feel better and stop blaming myself for the assaults I've been through sexually.

5 REPLIES 5

Re: Self harm urges

Hi @Evie1,

 

I don't know exactly what to tell you except that you are not alone in self blame

Re: Self harm urges

It's hard I'm always saying it's my fault and I dersevr the blame 

Re: Self harm urges

@Evie1 ,

 

I do to and it's actually quite common for sexual assault victims to self blame it's why so many aggressors get away with it I struggle with self blame which is why I've never reported any of my aggressors. Which makes it harder now because even if I did have the courage to do it now it probably  wouldn't do much nothing would come from it because  it was so long ago. But I spent to long going  between self blame  and 'it wasn't as bad as I think it is others have been through worse' type thing. I went through  sh and si thoughts and actions but nothing helped and to be honest 8 years on from my latest attack I still struggle only difference is that I'm not doing it alone I managed to confide in my partner  and a really close friend who look out for me and both have learned  the signs to look out for when I have dark thoughts. 

Honestly I think the best thing is having at least one person who you can trust and who won't freak out if you say you feel this way to just be there with you to help pull you through 

Re: Self harm urges

Hi forgive yourself. We all made mistakes. Forgive them for there mistakes. Keep the light of love blazing, not the cold of fear

Re: Self harm urges

Hi @Evie1 . You are not alone. Many on the forums have or had issues with self-harm in some form (including myself). Seeing a good psychologist regularly and talking to a few trusted friends was what helped me get it under control.

 

Do you have any support people you could talk to?

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