Lived Experience Forum

[sara]

Hello,

I'm not sure what i am doing or if this is in the right spot (i'm sorry in advance if it's not)

I look at your posts and stories and wonder if my own mental issues are real if i just should 'suck it up' but they feel real they affect me everyday.

Well a little about me......ummmm where to begin....I'm undiagnosed but I wonder if i have a mix of PTSD with depression.

I recently (10 months ago) left a emotionally and physically abusive marriage with my children. I thought everything would be ok I thought leaving everything would go back to some form of 'normal'....... it hasn't.

Everything has gone so far down hill.....things just keep happening... that dark spiral that just seems to get tighter and tighter around me.

every blow weather as big as losing my job to something small like my vacuum not working sends me over the edge. i turned to the drink there for a little but i am trying to not i know its bad. My friends try to get me to talk but i just shut down to the point i can not even speak to change the subject.

i'm scared

[Baboo]

Hello Sara,

Welcome to the forum,

Im glad you have been able to read some stories here. I think this place can help you with some ideas for coping or distraction stratigies too.

Drinking is never too good to ease depression as it is a depressant, but a drink here and there as long as your not abusing it or using it with medication if your on them is fine i think.

What do you do to help your self calm down when your feeling over whelmed?

Baboo

[sara]

hello Baboo, I sleep alot or try to play a computer game. It's hard with the kids I bottle it up till I'm alone mostly.
Sara

[CherryBomb]

Hi @sara 

Welcome to the Forums - you are in the right spot 

It can be overwhelming feeling like things are spiralling out of control. Life's blows can all add up with each one feeling like final straw on the camel's back. 

By the sounds of it, you've been through a lot. Being in an abusive relationship can take time to heal both physically and emotionally - it can leave many scars that are visible and invisible. It's no wonder you feel the way do. It takes time to work through this. Talking about it, and getting support can help. Though I understand this can be diffiicult. Coming on here is a great place to start. Sometimes writing can be less confronting than talking. Can I ask how long ago you left the relationship? Also, what state are you in? Perhaps I can point you to some resources/services in your area.

I think there are a few people who may be able to provide some advice who have gone through similar circumstances such @kristin, @Former-Member and  @hiddenite . They have experienced abusive relationships, and may be able to provide some advice/support. Also @Rick and @Loopy have a diagnosis of PTSD, they may be able to provide some information about the symptoms. 

Again welcome to Forums. 

Hope to see more of you on here.

CB

[Baboo]

Sleeping is good if your kids are still little and you have to get up at nights for them still- too much or too little of lots of things can put you out of balance.

Did you have any post separation counselling?

I do tend to preach about exercise and its benefits on mental health. Walking once a day can help your mind, and body so much. Do you do any exercises? i walk in the mornings and do a short bike in the afternoons.

[CherryBomb]

Also @sara 

Just a quick post to let you know that we have Topic Tuesday on tonight. We have the Author of 'Happy Sad Mummy' joining us online to discuss ways we can talk about mental illness with our children. 

Thought you might like to join the conversation, as I just noticed in one of your posts that you have children. You can join the conversation here. It starts at 7 AEST.

[sara]

Hi CB,
I left the relationship 9 months ago and i live in Victoria.
Thank you
Sara

[sara]

I've had no counseling just been trying to do it myself... be the big strong woman everybody expects....I'm not.
If I feel up to it i walk thought the national forest but it gets lonely so i mow the lawns or weed the garden beds

[Baboo]

Bush walking is very calming, and gardening if you like it is fantastic!

Can you go out for coffee with friends or family one a week to get some social time?

Do you chat to people in the supermarket when you do food shopping?

[sara]

I try to go out with my friends every fortnight when the kids are having there visit with their father.... it doesn't always go so well i feel out of place "the third wheel" and go home.
no i don't like supermarkets and if i do go and run into somebody i keep it as brief as i possibly can with out being rude.