Skip to main content
Forums Home
Illustration of people sitting and standing

New here?

Chat with other people who 'Get it'

with health professionals in the background to make sure everything is safe and supportive.

Register

Have an account?
Login

cancel
Showing results for 
Search instead for 
Did you mean: 

Our stories

Anon1975
Senior Contributor

Reintegrating into life

Hiya.   I am recovering from schizophrenia, I religiously take my meds and have started running.  I have been told I will never work again.

 

Sadly my illness has meant the loss of lifelong friends and families who found the delusions too difficult to deal with.  As I get better I hate the isolation it has left me with.

 

my career was my life previously and that was where most of my social interaction occurred.

 

I was therefore wondering if anyone has had a similar experience with this horrendous illness and  how they went about making friends in the real world.

24 REPLIES 24

Re: Reintegrating into life

Hi there @Anon1975

Welcome to the Forums 😊 I'm glad you've found us here, though sorry to hear of the impacts it sounds the beginnings of your recovery may've had in terms of increasing isolation. I hope you will find a sense of connection with others here given time, though I also know that connection in an anonymous online forum is likely very different to real life, in person connection. On that, I'm wondering if there are any particular hobbies you enjoy doing or interests you have? Meet Up is a website where you might be able to find groups of people based on particular interests. All the very best, 

 

TideisTurning 💙

Re: Reintegrating into life

Thank you.  I like running but there aren’t any running groups near me.  I also go to Pilates but the people on my classes are never the same and everyone keeps to themselves.  I tried badminton on meetup but I Didn’t find anyone I clicked with.

 

my friends I had previously I had for most of my life.  Then this thing crept into my life and wreaked absolute devastation and took my friends and family with it.  People know I was unwell but they won’t forgive me for the horrid deluded things I was saying and doing.  At the time it was so real.  I miss everyone so much.

 

I just don’t know where else to start.  I just want a friend or two who I can call and see how their day is and have the odd coffee.

Re: Reintegrating into life

I hear you @Anon1975. Lack of understanding can be really hard, and incredibly painful in situations like yours where we've lost loved ones because of that lack of understanding or a non willingness. I'm not sure what to say, other than I'm sorry that happened and the impact it's having on you. I'm sitting with you and I will hold hope that you will be able to find new connections to ease the sense of isolation you've been feeling 🧡 

Re: Reintegrating into life

Thank you. I’d love to meet someone who I could talk to about managing the grief of your illness in recovery about your delusions, your behaviour, lost friendships, career and of a past life you enjoyed and were proud of living. I just don’t know what to do with this existence, without a job, friendships, there seems to be little purpose here. I am managing to keep myself busy enough for now but I am 46 years of age and I know this is not a sustainable existence into old age. I miss my connections so much. I wish they could understand.

Re: Reintegrating into life

Hi @Anon1975 

I live with schizoaffective disorder which is like schizophrenia and I also have depression. I have lost a lot of friends over the years and jobs as well. I have found working for government agencies the best for supporting people like us. I wonder why you were told that you'll never work again as I can imagine that's not easy to deal with. Work or a career can be part of our self image. Could you volunteer?

I am lucky to have 2 friends who have stuck by me but sometimes I feel isolated too. I've thought about joining the church and meetup groups but I find it difficult to make the first step. 

The people on this forum are very kind, supportive and welcoming. Enjoy the connections here and welcome to the forum!

Re: Reintegrating into life

Hi @Anon1975 I'm wondering if any of these support groups might help.. some of them meet via zoom. Wishing you all the best on your journey.

Re: Reintegrating into life

If it helps at all, a peer worker I know who was told he'd never work again ~25 years ago proved that wrong long ago, gaining many new qualifications in peer work and psychology,  including gaining his Master's in the field, and for about the last seven years, he's been taking on leadership roles. 

 

I would definitely seek another opinion about that, I think they're bullshitting you - it's like that old joke about how if you hurt your hands, you say to the doctor 'will I be able to play the piano when I get better?' The doctor says 'yes', and you say 'that's great!  I've never been able to play the piano before!'  🙂

 

I found in the early part after my psychosis, I got a lot from the fleeting contacts like going to buy clothes - it was practice at being accepted as I was, and it kind of gave me hope for future, more meaningful, connections. 

 

What kinds of professional supports do you have in place?  What kinds of peer supports do you have in place?  Eventually I worked with an occupational therapist who convinced me I wasn't that disabled - and now I'm volunteering once a week in a clothing shop, just tidying the shelves, putting new stock out and occasionally serving customers. 

 

 It's completely natural to grieve, and it's amazing that you're putting your efforts now into exercising and taking your meds and getting those rote wellness planks down.  Beyond the day to day, what gives you hope, @Anon1975 ?

Former-Member
Not applicable

Re: Reintegrating into life

Hi @Anon1975 @it took me a good 6 years to find the right meds… now I’m in work and have been for the past 3 months, hoping to do more. 
ots good your seeing your psych and taking meds, best to do so - as for friends I’ve lost some along the way too and was nervous about reintegrating back to society, once you find your flow and what’s important you’ll be fine

Re: Reintegrating into life

Thank you.  What a beautiful post.  You ask about hope?  I don’t know what gives me hope.  My children and seeing them succeed in school and their careers, living happy and productive lives?  The feeling I get after a run and getting stronger and fitter?  One day getting married again.  To develop a stronger connection with my partner.  For someone to say that my treatment and level of descrimination I endured during my recent divorce proceedings by my lawyers was wrong and to make the situation right.  At the moment that is giving me hope.  That we aren’t as irrelevant and invisible as I was made to feel.

 

I find the hardest thing with my diagnosis is the level of expectation that is set for you by everyone.  There are no expectations in that you are now incapable of doing anything.  And if you manage to accomplish anything it’s by some sheer dumb luck rather than you applying yourself.  I was in an executive position in an accounting firm before I became unwell and now I am just twirling g my thumbs.  Not being able to productively use your mind is torture.  But I understand it’s extremely fragile.

 

I sent another apology to my close family and friends who I feel abandoned and judged by, only to be ignored again.  That hurts.

 

thank you for reaching out to me.  I loved reading your message.

Illustration of people sitting and standing

New here?

Chat with other people who 'Get it'

with health professionals in the background to make sure everything is safe and supportive.

Register

Have an account?
Login

For urgent assistance