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Looking after ourselves

Re: Walking on the road to recovery ........ 🤔

That’s awesone @utopia. Way to go you! I think the secret is to keep it small. The first time I did 5 weeds I ended up filling my green bin in about 20 min. I’m going to try it today too. I have massively struggled with motivation. Now my mood is a little (read wee) more stable I’ve struggled to keep going. I spent two days in the last week constantly going back to bed but the days I did manage to stay out I managed better than I have for most of this year. Let’s hope we get to kick 2018 butt a bit better. 😉

Re: Walking on the road to recovery ........ 🤔

That's brilliant @Teej. Keep doing what you're doing. It seems to be working

Re: Walking on the road to recovery ........ 🤔

I like the 5 weeds idea too @Teej 

FOr last 10 years I garden like @Faith-and-Hope does her raids on the house. I use my energy in the moment for what I see at the time and allow myself not to worry about the look, but go with the seasons, hibernate in winter and come out in spring, then hide away in the heat again but out more i  autumn.. It has helped me find my own flow.  Now I might only get about 5-10 weeds a year .... Woman Happy

I will be targetting the car and my desk next.  The desk has been avoided and a dumping ground for papers for years Woman Embarassed.... SO lots to do ... so then I might focus on writing again.  I used my lounge table with laptop as a desk for last few years.

I was offered the flourish group and it seemed to segue nicely after the Royal Commission.  I am using it as a summary and sorting of my issues, cant make 2 of the groups cos of family commitments but thats alright. Group is very small and most people are much worse off than I, but I like facilitators and the model of Neami.  Its a distraction from worrying about my son.

Re: Walking on the road to recovery ........ 🤔

Wow @Teej - This is awesome! Love the positive turn around, especially as it came from such a big moment that had you seek support which was a helpful experience for you - that's really cool.

Up and down and round and round but maybe in a kind of forwards direction? Yay 😊

Thanks for sharing with us. It's so great to see you.

💗

Re: Walking on the road to recovery ........ 🤔

Hello @Teej

I have just been reading through and honestly inspired by what you have been doing to look after yourself and push yourself towards your goals, not easy to do at all.

I am so pleased to hear about your experiences with the DBT group program and the skills that you learnt as well as the dynamic in a group setting and how that helped you to be aware of your barriers and find ways of letting those walls down. Ofcourse there is that practise and it taking time aspect, but as long as you are aware of that and stick to it, you will get there and those skills will become more automatic for you and less work.

So proud that you are working towards a volunteering role, I have no doubt you will be great at that, it does sound like a a great thing to be working towards just take it slowly like you are and getting support to get you to that point - it is great there is that woman from the council to help ease your fears too.

Nice one and great work @Teej Smiley Very Happy

 

Re: Walking on the road to recovery ........ 🤔

Oops so sorry @Lunar@CheerBear@Appleblossom@utopia for not responding earlier. Your support all gave me warm fuzzies but I think I was a little overwhelmed to respond at the time. 

Re: Walking on the road to recovery ........ 🤔

Just wondering how everyone copes with being so sensitive to others moods. Today I've had a topsy-turvey day where I struggled this morning, then fell in a big whole but got myself up then had a difficult phone call and fell in a hole and couldn't get up and then reached for support which was the helping hand I needed to get back up. Just a while ago my son and girlfriend came over both in bad moods and had an argument and my mood plummeted and I'm horizontal again. I so much don't want to fall over with simple things like this. Does anyone have any strategies they use for when others affect their mood (and in my case my ability to function).

I know this is so pathetic. I know so many others have lots of really tricky things they are navigating and I kind of feel so stupid posting that I'm so pathetic but would really like to know if anyone else has ways they manage this.

Re: Walking on the road to recovery ........ 🤔

It took me a while to actually understand something my mother used to say to me @Teej ..... it was, "Dont wear it Lovie" ....

I heard this from when I was a child, and I took it to mean "so t let it wear on you" or "wear you down". It was only when I had lost my Mum and her sister came from the other side of Australia for her funeral that I got that enormous flash of insight when my aunt turned tonne and said, "Don't wear it Lovie" in relation to something awful that someone had said ...... I suddenly realised it mean to take off what should not have been put on you and put it away from you ......

From that moment I have been able to do that in relation to other peoples moods, tempers, attitudes ..... not with 100% accuracy in the moment ..... but getting there with it ..... Generaly by the end of an hour or two. It takes remembering, and just ima simple quoined phrase does that for me.

I hope you can either use this one, or find a touchstone of your own that reminds you to take off their attitude / temper / bad behaviour and discard it ...... it's not yours to wear or even carry along with you.

💜

Re: Walking on the road to recovery ........ 🤔

@Teej. I find distractions work well for me. But first I have to rant or cry. Acknowledge what I'm feeling. Then I can move onto a distraction. Something else.
Otherwise if I hold onto it - it can just eat me up.

Re: Walking on the road to recovery ........ 🤔

Thank you both @utopia@Faith-and-Hope

Yes @utopia, it eats me up. I just fall over and feel like I’ve been hit by a truck. Tonight it just zapped any energy and motivation I had and disintegrated it all. 

@Faith-and-Hope I had kind of wondered if it was a self talk thing I needed to try. It was really nice to read how you overcome it. 

The thing is I was really sensitive and it just took two scowled faces arriving for my body to react, there was no yelling or anything. I think I just needed to have even and supportive after a difficult 24 hours. Thank you both for responding. It’s meant the world to me just now. 

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