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Looking after ourselves

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Comfort Zone

The conventional wisdom seems to be that stepping outside your comfort zone is good, worthwhile, admirable. Lately I feel like that idea makes a big assumption about being in a comfort zone to begin with. I rarely am. Some days getting outside my comfort zone means getting out the door, or even getting out of bed.

This morning I had a job interview, which really wreaked havoc with my mood. I'm now wired when I need to be winding down. Not to suggest that we can't take on challenges, learn and grow, but sometimes it comes at a cost that most people can't begin to fathom.

So I thought I'd start this thread to chat about how to find your comfort zone. It would make a nice change! I have an app that includes 'sleep stories' - calming voices reading stories - I think I've only made it through 1 of them, over many listens. So that works for me.

@greenpea @CheerBear @Shaz51 @eth @EOR @utopia @Mazarita @outlander @Faith-and-Hope @Hamsolo01 @Queenie @Teej @Appleblossom @Adge @Wanderer @Sans911 ...I'd love to hear from anyone with ideas.


Re: Comfort Zone

my feelings and thoughts exactly ... recently I challenged the concept of  a comfort agreement ... the word gets me all triggered and confused.



although as I have grown and worked hard and my physical circumstances have changed ... I am "learning" about being comfortable ... and learning to be comfortable in my own skin ... somehow I think that is a problem for a lot of people with mh ... feeling alright in their own skin


Re: Comfort Zone

Thanks so much for tagging me @frog 


I am a bit fried tonight, but so will get back to you about this thread.  Good job !  It’s a great topic area.

Re: Comfort Zone

This is a great thread @frog, thanks for starting it. We can see how stepping outside your comfort zone means that you have to be comfortable to begin with, so we should celebrate those wins, even if it's simply getting out of bed in the morning (because let's be real, that can be a big struggle on some days). 


Those sleep stories sound great, have you seen those cake and biscuit decorating videos? Those can be quite calming and comforting too.

Re: Comfort Zone

I don't think I'm in a comfort zone @frog . I think I'm in a rut. And a lot of the time it's relatively comfortable to be in this rut.  I understand what to expect in my rut. 

By trying to get out of it or out of a comfort zone,  it terrifies me.  I don't know what to expect. I don't know if I could do it.  Will I fail?  Total fear and anxiety 

Re: Comfort Zone

Hi @frog 

Interesting thread. I guess for me i know that when something causes me nore anxiety than usual im entering out the comfort zone even if they are just thoughts. For example going to a family function- even the thought of it makes me anxious and uncomfortable because it takes me out of my own little comfort bubble. 


Re: Comfort Zone

Hey dear @frog  reading through this thread I need to know where my boundaries lie in order to set up a comfort zone. Unfortunately I can’t do this tonight as medication is fast taking over.

 I will however return to this thread in the morning.

Re: Comfort Zone

@frog  Hi frog great idea for a thread Smiley Happy thanks for including lil peaxxx to find my comfort zone I listen to really fast music (like I am now lol). I am listening to 2 hearts beat as one by u2 but I like many different types of music it all depends upon my mood. Often however it is fast and I have no idea why fast rock etc would have that effect you think it would be totally the opposite effect ....  I am a strange lil pea at times.


Also walking in the early mornings as you all know helps me find my comfort zone for the rest of the day. I love my early morning walks looking at nature, the sky with the stars and the moon, saying good morning to the odd passerby is extremely comforting to me. greenpeaxxxxx

Re: Comfort Zone

Hey @frog and all. Great thread. I agree that taking on challenges can take a huge toll and that it isn't something that everyone understands. Getting out of my comfort zone has at times been absolutely exhausting (emotionally and physically). It's wrecked me and left me wondering whether it is worth it. I hope you were able to find some calm last night.

An aspect of comfort zone for me is very literal (an actual phsyical boundary or zone). How big that zone is can change and I know I am am in it when I feel relatively calm and not bonkers anxious or hypervigilant. Sometimes the zone is only our house and anything beyond the fence is out of it. Other days I have extended that as far as the school which is a few minutes walk away and the little shops that are in that area. When I'm feeling OK but not great (which is most of the time), I have a small comfort zone I move around in. Slowly, very slowly, I am extending that too. On a good day I can go a bit further and with practice it often becomes comfortable enough. To get to my new work adventure I have to drive way, waaaay out of my comfort zone. I had a support worker take me the first time and I watched and took mental notes of the bits that looked scary. I've spent heaps of time on maps planning routes, places to safely stop if I flip out, back up plans if there's too much traffic or I'm feeling too anxious to go a certain way etc. I'm not sure when, if ever, the drive will be in my comfort zone but where I am doing my work thing is super comfort zone-ish so I know when I get there I have landed somewhere safe which makes it possible for me push myself to get to. When I finish all I want is to be home and in my safe zone and that helps me make my way back I think.

There's heaps more to comfort zone that that, like comfort people, comfort things, comfort activities etc. But that literal zone is a big one for me.

Interesting conversation and thread to read through. Thanks for starting this discussion ❤

Re: Comfort Zone

@frogThis is a great idea for a discussion and sharing of ideas and information.  


I don't like to get out of my comfort zone to often.  I feel that at work I'm pushed and not given a great deal of choice.  I particularly don't like giving presentations or being asked to run a meeting for a large group of participants.  I often think that its not in my position description, I didn't sign up for this.  Managers delegate stuff down the line that they should deal with.  I often wonder what it is the managers actually do LOL.


My comfort zone is being in the country and at my farm.  Being isolated and alone, enjoying nature.  On the coast where I spent more than half the time its probably waking early and being phsyically active when I can.  I usually only do this once or twice a week, but, sometimes I manage it a bit more frequently. 


When I was younger I found the ocean very soothing, being alone in the waves was so invigorating, it felt like I had not a worry in the world.  It felt so privilaged to be surrounded by such beauty and awe inspiring places.  I never took for granted what I had and miss the beach lifestyle greatly LOL 


You mentioned an app, I've found one called 'calm' where you can download sounds from nature of varying length.  Its handy as you don't have to be online to play them.  Music also helps me get into a comfort zone to.  Lastly for Me, breathing and taking a deep breath helps Me centre and ground myself in the moment.


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